Page 42 of Crossed Up

I grip his arm even tighter, knowing now where this is going.

“Dad was up in arms about me driving and kept tryin’ to open his door, but he was three sheets to the damn wind and didn’t realize I had set the child locks before we left. He got pissed, turned to me, and grabbed the wheel in a fit of rage.”

Aidan turns to me with tears in his eyes, and the amount of guilt shining back at me nearly knocks the breath from my lungs.

“The car swerved, and we hit a massive tree stump. It all happened in less than ten seconds. One minute, I was shoutin’ at my dad to knock it the fuck off, and the next, we were upside down with a tree nearly splittin’ the front of the car in half. The officers who responded to the call told me we likely hit the stump and flipped over it, sending the car careening into another tree. I lost consciousness, but I have no idea how long I was out. Long enough for Mama to call me a dozen times. But my phone was on the roof of the car so I couldn’t reach it. Against my better judgment, I looked over at my dad, but he was so still. And there was so much blood. But… I waited. I managed to use my pocket knife to cut myself out of the seatbelt and get out of the car, but I waited to call for help.”

His voice grow more ragged as he tells the story, and I can tell without even asking that this is the part that eats away at him, the part that drowns him in guilt every day.

“I wanted him to die, Lyla. I waited to call for help because I was hopin’ he wouldn’t make it out alive.”

My heart breaks for this man who was dealt such an awful hand by fate. One who’s spent his entire adult life taking care of people to atone for his perceived wrongdoings.

“Aidan… your father wasn’t a good man. There’s no way you can know that waiting for help caused him to die. But honestly, even if it did… you may have saved your mother’s life.”

He snorts derisively and wipes his nose on a napkin he pulls out of the glove compartment. “You know what’s ironic? It’s been eight years, and I still beat myself up about it to this day, wondering if anything would have been different if I called the second I woke up. But the asshole died on impact. He didn’t suffer. He wasn’t hanging upside down, bleeding out while I sat there sobbin’ like a scared kid. His neck snapped and severed his spinal cord, killing him instantly.”

A strangled gasp escaped my throat, and I climb into Aidan’s lap, resting my back against the steering wheel. Using my hands to cup his face, I angle my head to meet his watery gaze. “Listen to me, Aidan. You did nothing wrong. It’s tragic that your father died so traumatically, but there was not a single thing you could have done to change it. You can’t possibly think you deserve punishment for something you didn’t even do.”

His large hands cover mine on his cheeks, and he uses the contact to pull me closer so he can bury his head in my neck. He’s so much taller than me that it’s almost comical how far he has to bend to make it happen.

I stroke my hands through his shaggy hair in what I hope is a soothing motion, trying to reassure him without words that I don’t see him any differently after his confession.

“I’ve never told a single soul about my part in what happened that night. They know about the crash and that my dad died on impact, but they all think I was passed out until I called 9-1-1. And I didn’t correct them. How could I admit to my mom and brother what I’d done? What kind of person waits to call for help, hoping their parent dies before anyone arrives?”

My hands continue their soothing motion in his hair as I pull him even closer. “A teenager that had been repeatedly brutalized by the one person that’s supposed to love them more than anything. Someone who had to watch his mom and younger brother be tortured at the hands of a monster who used his family to exercise his demons.”

Taking a deep breath, I offer him another small piece of my truth. “I know what it’s like to feel powerless at the hands of someone who’s supposed to love you. That’s how I know you did nothing wrong.”

He lifts his head to meet my eyes, unanswered questions thick in the air between us. I can see in his eyes he wants to ask, but I also see the moment he decides against it. I can’t hide my sigh of relief.

Aidan takes the opportunity to press his forehead to mine. “I need to know soon, Ly. Even if you decide you never want to be more than friends, I need to know what kind of danger you’re in so I can keep you and Crew safe.”

Guilt squeezes my chest, and my eyes sting with the imminent threat of tears. Aidan was brave for me, so I swallow the bitter taste of my fear and dig deep for some of the bravery I had when I left Sebastian and started a whole new life hundreds of miles away from home.

“I was born and raised in a small-ish town in Maryland by a rotating horde of nannies hired by my famous father. I don’t remember my mother or even know who she is. All I know is she wasn’t there.”

Understanding dawns in his eyes, and I’m sure some of the things I’ve said are starting to make sense, but I keep going so I don’t chicken out.

“Shortly after I turned twenty, my dad introduced me to an associate’s son, hoping we would hit it off.” Aidan growls, and I grimace up at him. “To make an incredibly long story short, we did. We dated for a few months before he proposed and convinced me to move in with him.”

Aidan pulls me to his chest with a hand on the back of my head, and his beachy scent calms the storm raging in my mind. “My ex wasn’t a good man, Aid. He hurt me in so many ways, and one day, I couldn’t take it anymore. During his last blow-up, I managed to knock him out by sheer luck, so I took what I couldn’t live without and ran. I took the first bus out and landed here. I met Wren a week later, and the rest is history.”

My eyes lock on his, and I hope he knows how much I mean my next words. “I promise I’m doing everything I can to keep you and Crew out of it, but when I started getting threatening texts, I finally caved and accepted the help Wren offered on behalf of Copeland. He got in contact with the FBI and managed to help build a case against my ex, but they can’t meet to exchange information for another three weeks.”

I finish my explanation with a huff as if the weight of all the events from the last year suddenly dropped off my shoulders now that someone else knows. For the first time in months, I feel like I can breathe for a moment without looking over my shoulder.

A strong hand tilts my chin up, and the sight of Aidan’s understanding gaze makes my earlier tears spring back to the surface. I’ve kept so much from him, and the fact that he’s able to look at me with anything but anger is more than I ever could have hoped for.

“I’m going to want a name eventually, angel,” he grumbles roughly.

Raising a brow, I stare at him skeptically. “Why?”

He growls, shifting to grip my chin tightly between his thumb and forefinger. “So I can kill the son of a bitch who thought he could lay hands on you and get away with it.”

My breath catches at the conviction in his voice, and I know in that moment he means every word. If I gave him Sebastian’s name right now, he wouldn’t hesitate to hunt him down. I’ve never had someone defend me so fiercely before, especially for something that happened before he even met me.

Aidan eyes me like he’s worried I’ll panic over the threat of violence, but it seems to have had the opposite effect, and whatever he sees in my eyes has a pained groan leaving his throat before he yanks my head forward and kisses me.

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