Page 49 of The Sound Of Us

I love the way you touch me.

I want to touch you the way you touch me.

I want to taste you.

What would you feel like inside me?

The admission of the last one jerks me out of my nonsensical fantasies. I search the app for a search history. I find none and hope the search doesn’t show up somewhere else. Frank likes to go through my phone from time to time. If there’s nothing to hide, what’s the problem? He said one time when I asked why. So, I make sure my browsing history is always clear.

Pepper appears to be satisfied with her rock burials and sits in front of me, panting and wagging her tail.

“You done?” I ask, scratching behind her ears.

She barks. Yes.

I don't think you need to hear or speak to understand someone. Because understanding someone, knowing them, doesn’t need words.

Frank and I talk all the time. He’s heard every word I’ve ever said to him about the state of our marriage, how much it hurts me when he treats me bad, but he’s never understood a single word I’ve said.

Pepper and I walk back home.

I’ll learn sign language.

I’ll grown my hair back out.

I’ll cook Frank something nice to eat when he gets back.

Chapter 25

Eli

I can’t get the feel of him out of my mouth. It’s been hours since Axel left, hours since I had him in my mouth, but my mind won’t let me forget the thick ridges of the veins along his cock. The thickness of his penis pulsing, jerking in my throat.

I don’t give a fuck that he’s married. As long as Axel comes to me, as long as his answer isn’t no, I’ll pursue him.

I consider walking over to their side just to check on him. Frank might be back home from his shift, but that doesn’t matter. I’ll just check if Axel is okay. Make sure there’s no trouble over there.

I give myself migraines trying to figure out how to get Axel away from here.

I consider telling my mother, but things feel too chaotic. Too messy.

At five a.m. the flicker of the bedroom light tells me someone’s at the door. I jump out of bed. The pounding at the back of my head moves to my temples.

There are only two people who could possibly be ringing my doorbell at this time of the morning, and one of them isn’t a human.

It’s the non-human that’s ringing my doorbell. I can’t believe how smart this dog is. I love her.

Pepper bolts into the house, heading straight for the kitchen where I keep her bribe snacks, but before I can go give her a treat, movement catches my eye from just up the path.

But it’s not Axel coming down the path looking for Pepper.

Frank Davis’ mouth moves, but he’s still too far away for me to make anything out. He might have called out to Pepper because she races back to the front door, wagging her tail. She could also be reminding me that I need to give her a treat. I don’t know, and either way, I don’t know what Frank is saying.

Soon, he’s standing in front of me, making grand gestures with his hands and pointing to Pepper, who’s bolting between the door and the kitchen. She’s more playful than usual.

I want to ask him where Axel is, but he won’t understand and I refuse to make the effort with him that I do with Axel.

He gives me a broad smile. I’m barely able to stomach half of one.

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