Page 66 of The Sound Of Us

Thoughts of Eli fucking me give me the courage I need, and my expectations begin to shift.

I don’t need Frank’s love. I don’t need him to be the man he promised to be. I don’t need to obsess over what I could do to please him, how I could change myself, how I could understand him more, so he’d be better.

I have Eli.

I don’t need Frank.

I just need to figure out how to not die at the hand of my husband.

I listen for noises. The scrapes of Frank’s boots come from outside. He’s having a smoke.

I urge Pepper to the door, making sure her heavy body is flush against it.

Then, sitting on the toilet seat, I rub my palm over my erection. Dark thoughts unfurl in my head. These thoughts bring with them courage and an uncaringness for my vows. I tilt my hips forward, imagining Eli inside me.

Fuck Frank.

My hand slips inside my sweats and I wrap my hands around my dick. Pre-cum oozes out, a testament to my lust for Eli. With blood rushing in my ears and my dick begging for release, I pump fast and hard, swiping at images inside my head.

Of Eli with his face in my ass.

His mouth on me.

His cock buried deep inside my hole.

Thick cum flies over my fist and my abdomen. I massage my dick, milking my orgasm.

A sheen of sweat covers my upper lip and I tilt my head back while my heart rate slowly descends to a regular pace.

I wash my hands and then I leave the bathroom, prepare Frank’s breakfast and call him in to eat.

He eyes me all through breakfast, watching me push my eggs around my plate. “Stop wasting the fuckin’ food, Axel.” And when he doesn’t like my silence, he adds, “What’re you, deaf and dumb, like that neighbor of ours?”

Without speaking, I lift a forkful of eggs to my mouth.

That deaf and dumb neighbor’s dick was inside me just a few hours ago, is what I tell Frank inside my head. Outwardly, I settle for, “Do you want more eggs?”

Chapter 36

Eli

I haven’t seen Axel in two days. I’m out of my mind with worry. I’ve driven past there more times than I want to admit to. The bookstore is closed this weekend so I can’t see him there.

He wasn't at sign language class today.

I’m distracted, and it’s showing.

A touch on my back draws me out of my rushing thoughts.

Are you okay? Mrs. Dalton signs when I turn around.

I nod and sign back. I’m okay.

She leans in close, her face turned up. “Is Axel okay?” she asks with her voice. I look around me to see if anyone is around. The library has mostly cleared out.

I lift my shoulder in a shrug. She frowns and takes my hand in hers, leading me to the back of the library, where it’s quiet.

Then she takes out a notebook and a pen and writes.

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