Page 67 of Rebel Summer

Now he was goading me. Usually, I would push him away or smack him in the arm for that, but this time, our eyes clung as my mind raced right alongside my heart.

I stood up and disappeared into the back room for a minute, feeling Dax’s gaze on me as I left. Underneath the calendar of the beautiful and voluptuous 1960s women, Dax had tacked his paper onto the wall. I yanked the list down.

I’d spent my whole life living for others. Going to college for someone else. Getting my degree for someone else. Even getting a job at Vanderbilt for someone else. What would happen if I were to step a foot outside the mold? Or just, you know...dipped a toe?

I wanted so badly to feel different. To be different. I wanted one moment where my choices were mine. Even if it ended up being a mistake, I wanted to choose. I wanted to feel off-balance. And there was one person in this whole world who just might be game.

I strode back into the Lego room, the door hitting the wall with a force that made Dax jump.

“You’ve got to stop doing th?—“

“I’m doing the list,” I announced, sounding more assured than I felt. But I had made up my mind. Whatever was bubbling inside of me was now unleashed. A new life and energy pumped through my veins with a jarring certainty.

Dax’s eyebrows raised in interest. “Do you remember the list? I’m pretty sure I didn’t add a dance party on there.”

“There’s still time.”

He snorted and looked back down at his Legos, as comfortable as I’d seen him in a while. “You’re not doing it.”

“I am. And first up, I’m getting a tattoo.”

Biology Class

Day 24

“Nice tattoo,” I said, my eyes traveling all over the pink and slightly puffy skin. It was an old car, and honestly, it looked pretty cool—though I’d never admit that to him. “Did your mom take you to get it?”

Without skipping a beat, Dax said, “Nope. Your mom did.”

I whacked his arm while he laughed.

I was so ready for this tattoo.

So.

So.

Soooo.

Ready.

During these past four minutes, it was all I could think about. I kept envisioning a…something…on my arm, just where the sleeve would hit. And that…something…that amazing something would be the talk of the town. It was brilliant, really, killing two birds with one stone. I got to knock fifty hours off of my time, and if my dad happened to see me sporting a tattoo around town before I left, all the better.

Dax had been strangely quiet after my declaration. I had to tell him three times before he showed any semblance of believing me, but when he did, he smiled. He even told me he’d take me tomorrow—if I still wanted to go. Then he handed me back my Legos, completely fixed, and walked off toward his garage.

He didn’t believe me.

“Hey!”

He turned back around, his head tilted to one side.

“I want to go now.”

Still, he watched me, calculating, and I shifted under his stare.

“I’ll go by myself if I have to.”

He didn’t move. I guess I had to show my cards.