Page 69 of All The Things: The Last Thing He Needs Omnibus

Tommy could hear the catch of Bobby’s breath at the mention of her name. Bobby even mourned for people like Cheryl.

“I have no idea, Tom,” Bobby said quietly. He glanced at Tommy before looking back at the road. “You might have to tell him yourself.” After a long pause, he added in a whisper, “I’m sorry.”

He didn’t know if Bobby was offering condolences or if he was simply sorry because Tommy would have to break the news to Cal. Either way, Tommy didn’t know what to say.

The silence stretched between them for a long moment before Bobby asked, “You okay?”

“I have no idea.” It was the only honest answer he had.

When they pulled up in front of the hospital a few minutes later, Bobby found a parking spot. “You ready for this?”

Tommy let out a sour laugh. “No.” But he got out of the car.

It took them a few minutes to find the right floor and get checked in as visitors. Bobby said he’d stay in the waiting room and let Tommy have some privacy with his father.

“You sure that’s a good idea?” Tommy’s tone was joking, but he seriously wondered if he should be alone with Cal.

Bobby put his arms over Tommy’s shoulders and kissed him. “I’m sure. There’s a security guard in there.”

Tommy pulled back and turned for the door when the nurse buzzed him through. “Just my luck.”

Cal looked better than Tommy had ever seen him. He was clean, his face was shaved, and he looked like he knew where he was. He had been sitting at a table, but he stood up when he saw Tommy. “Hi, Son.”

For a moment it looked like Cal was going to reach out to shake Tommy’s hand, but he stopped the motion with a jerk and sat back down when Tommy glared at him.

“You’re alive.” It was the only thing that came to mind, so Tommy said it.

Cal knocked his fingers on the table, like he’d found a new nervous habit. “That I am,” he said. “Those words have never been truer.”

Tommy had no response for that, so he asked, “Did you hear about Cheryl?”

Cal looked down at his hands and folded them neatly on the table over a small stack of envelopes. Tommy didn’t bother to ask what they were about as he waited for an answer. “I did, yeah.” After a pause, Cal added, “I need to make some kind of arrangements, but I’m not really in the right frame of mind for it.”

Tommy could identify, but probably for different reasons. He’d only spared a few minutes to think about Cheryl since it all happened. He knew he needed to do something for her, but he had no idea what. Two years ago, he might have simply walked away from it altogether, but now that it was real and she was gone, Tommy felt like the family should have a memorial for her, bury her, something. She had given them Max and Zoe, and even if that was the only good thing she did with her entire life, it was worth acknowledging.

“We’ll sort it out for her,” Tommy told his father. The words were prickly in his mouth. His father should be the one to do it, to make the effort, and to grieve her death, but just like everything else, Tommy would have to do that for Cal too.

Cal examined his fingertips for a long minute. “Thank you, Son.” He was silent for so long, Tommy thought that might be it. He was considering getting up when Cal spoke again. “I’m still not sure how I feel about… her death. I need to work on that in group a little, I think.”

Tommy resisted the urge to roll his eyes. He hadn’t asked how his father felt, and frankly, at that moment Tommy didn’t give a damn. “You’ve been in here six weeks?” he asked instead.

“Yeah.” Cal nodded and looked Tommy in the eye. “After Christmas, I…. That night, when you found us trying to….”

“Steal from your children?” Tommy provided acidly.

Cal nodded again. “Yes, that.” He could see his father swallow hard, like the memory was painful, but Tommy didn’t want to think about how difficult this was for him. “It was, well, they keep calling it a moment of clarity, and that’s the most accurate way I can describe it.”

“Cheryl said it’d only been a few days since she’d seen you.”

“Well, you know she could… lose track of time.”

“Yeah, meth can do that to a girl.” Maybe he was an asshole for saying that, but Tommy didn’t care.

Cal bit his lips together and looked away from Tommy. “It can,” he agreed before looking back at him. He finally asked, “How are the kids?”

Tommy could feel his temper rising. “Oh, you remember them?”

“I do,” Cal whispered. “Do they have a place to stay? Was anyone hurt?”

---