Page 14 of She's the Star

Actually…never mind. It sounds even more messed up after I explain it.

“I didn’t want help,” I insist.

He grumbles something indistinct before saying, “You loved that job.”

I’m not sure that’s true. I can admit I was thrilled when I got the promotion and was proud to have earned it on my own merits. Plus, I adored the idea of being in charge and shaping policy from the inside. Unfortunately, I’d been more of a figurehead than an arbitrator of change. And I’d missed being amongst children all day. “I’ll find another job.”

“You’ve only worked at one place. How are you going to explain being fired from your only job? Or do you intend to pretend you’ve been unemployed for the last seven years?”

“I can’t disclose the reason I left, so I’ll simply tell them that I’m ready for a new challenge. I wouldn’t mind going back into the classroom.” The slog of looking for another job while not mentioning the last one is not appealing.

“You shouldn’t let other people dictate the trajectory of your life,” he responds. “I wish you’d let me help.” He wishes he got to dictate the trajectory of my life.

“You’ve always been too stubborn for your own good,” he adds.

“And you’ve always been too pushy for your own good.”

“I have fewer complaints than you seem to think.” He chuckles. “Most people accept my assistance without argument.”

That is all too true. The rest of my family take advantage of being related to Russell Gage as often as possible. Even Nicky was willing to use our father’s connections to score a coveted job in the New York fashion scene.

“I’m okay. I don’t need help. I promise I’ll figure things out.”

“Do you need money? I can?—”

“No,” I say sharply.

He lets out another long-suffering sigh. “I just want my children to be happy. Is that too much to ask?”

“Of course not.” But I will not feel guilty for refusing to live off my father. “I am happy.”

And now that I’ve been fired, I have the chance to discover something new.

Something better.

My stupid brain flashes to Amber Hope and the nanny job. It’s hard to understand why she’d offer a stranger a job as her daughter’s nanny, but now that I know my father isn’t pulling any strings, I’m slightly intrigued.

Going from headmaster to nanny would be a step backward professionally. I have a master’s degree, and I had a prestigious job. I had a plan for my life. But that plan is shot to hell now. Maybe it’s time to consider a new path.

FIVE

AMBER

I’m sitting on the floor, guitar in my lap, playing the same chords over and over as I try to decide if I like the melody when Mina sails into the playroom. Maddy’s next to me, lying on her stomach and chewing on one of her brand-new teething rings.

“You want the bad news or the annoying news?” she asks, chomping on her gum.

Why can’t she have good news? Annoying and bad don’t even seem that different. “Annoying.”

She blows a bubble and sucks it back into her mouth. “Teddy was videotaped last night with someone. At the right angle, in the dim light, it could be you.”

“It wasn’t me.” I sigh as my fingers switch to a familiar melody. It doesn’t matter what I say or do—somehow there’s always a story about me and Teddy floating around. “Show me.”

“Amber,” she says.

“Mina,” I reply.

She blows another huge bubble, and I sigh again. We both know what’ll happen if I look. I’ll start reading the comments, and within minutes, I’ll become a wee bit obsessed with what people are saying. I’ll waste a couple hours focused on a narrative I can’t control, and then I’ll waste a couple more hours trying to convince myself I don’t care.

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