Page 114 of Not Dating Material

Dad swears. “I would never. All I’ve ever wanted was to see you happy, Mols. Want me to come there? Want to come home? I can have a plane ticket for you in a second.”

Hearing how solidly I have his support somehow helps make me feel better about my decision. “Thank you, but I’m not running this time. I’m not chasing. Madden has a date set up with a really nice man, and I’m going to go on it, and on every other date I need to, until I find my person. Because of you, I know there are good men out there. I just need to find mine.”

He sighs, and I know he’s fighting with himself over wanting to protect me. “Finding a man isn’t everything.”

“I know.” I sit down and turn on my computer. “But it’s what I want. What will make me happy.” I open the secret project I’ve been working on and haven’t been able to look at all week. It’s hurt too much to look at the thing I’d been so sure would make Seven happy and now only fills me with dread so deep I’m choking on it.

“Then I hope it happens quickly. You’re a good kid. The best. Nothing would make me happier than to see you settled down.”

“Even if it meant I was settled down in Seattle?”

I can picture the exact way his face would soften at this moment. “I hear that’s a nice city to retire to.”

“The best.”

“Love you, Mols.”

“Love you too, Dad.”

We hang up, and even though the comic pages make me want to curl into a ball and never climb back out again, I shove the emotion aside. It was so close. Almost perfect. And if Seven’s going to deny me, he’s going to know exactly the kind of devotion he’s letting go.

I add the finishing touches to my art, aggressively checking references to the original, and when it’s finally done, I print it off, bind it together, and walk down the hall to his room.

I swallow as I look over the Kill Diver cover with the artwork of Seven in Omron’s uniform.

Maybe he’ll think it’s weird.

Or too much.

Or borderline creepy.

Maybe he won’t take it the way I mean it, as a way of showing him that I want to make him happy. That I see him as a hero too.

And I don’t care.

I’m done with trying to be who I think people want me to be.

I draw a shaky breath, then duck and slide it under his door.

Chapter 33

SEVEN

“Serious question,” Xander says, walking into my room without knocking. “Why are you the greatest dumb-dumb head I’ve ever met?”

“Go away.” I’m still curled on my bed with the comic Molly drew me, unable to open it, but the cover was enough. He made this for me. I don’t deserve him.

“No, really. Elle, Aggy, and I all voted. We’ve ordered a crown and everything.”

I ignore him because it’s the only way to deal with Xander when he gets like this.

“I’m just struggling to understand why my future brother-in-law is getting ready for a date with a human male who isn’t you. Why, Seven? Why?”

I groan and bury my face under my pillow whilst flipping Xander the bird. It’s been a long week. Avoiding Molly in a house this size should be easy, but every time I want to use my desk, he’s working; every time I’m coming or going from the tattoo shop, he’s sitting out the front, or standing in the kitchen, or halfway sticking out of a bush trying to tempt Kismet with treats.

And every glimpse of that mop of hair, of those big brown eyes, of his sullen expression, gets me right in the chest.

He has no right to look as irresistible as he does when he’s sulking. And he’s definitely sulking. We don’t talk, we don’t hang out—it’s like he’s suddenly mute in my presence. The puzzle is gone from the dining room table, and there’s no more home-cooked meals waiting for me when I get home.

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