Page 12 of Not Dating Material

MOLLY

The man across from me smiles, lines around his eyes deepening, and I do my best to smile back. He’s a total silver fox, super fucking attractive, and I have to hand it to Madden: he’s given me exactly what I said I wanted.

The problem is, I don’t think I actually know what I want.

I love the maturity of older guys, but it’s so hard to find someone I can connect with. Common ground isn’t something I find easily, and other than generic small talk, everything else leads to conversation that reminds me how different we are.

Gerald shifts forward, leaning over the table between us, eyes sliding down my exposed neck. “You want to get out of here?”

Heat floods my cheeks. This is never my favorite part of the conversation. “Actually, I don’t, you know, on a first date.”

“Ah.” Gerald’s gaze pings away from me, expression closing over. Oh, no. I recognize that look.

“I’m sorry?”

“Don’t be.” He holds up his hand, signaling for the bill. “This has been fun, but if I’m honest, I don’t waste time, kid. You’re cute and all, but I’m not interested in, well …” He waves a hand like he expects the silence to fill in the rest of his sentence. But it doesn’t. And I can’t.

Not interested in what? Dating? Commitment? Me?

And even though I wasn’t sure about him to begin with, panic at being turned down takes over.

“Wait. We can. It’s fine. I just know that usually when I do, men never call back, and so I was trying something different, but if that’s a deal breaker for you …” My throat is closing over, making it hard to get out the rest of my words.

Gerald’s heavy eyebrows bristle. “No. If you have boundaries, you keep them. Just know that they might not always line up with what someone else is looking for.”

“But I’m okay with hooking up!” I assure him, only I do it so loudly the people sitting at the tables either side of us glance over.

His posture tenses, making it clear he’s noticed the attention. “Molly, that’s enough.”

“What? I’m not good enough for you?”

“Keep your voice down.”

My eyes sting with tears. “One minute, you’re asking me to leave with you, and now you don’t want me to?”

“Molly …”

“Take me home. You have my full permission. In fact, we don’t even need to go that far—”

He abruptly stands and grabs his jacket.

“—they have bathrooms here!” I call to his retreating back.

It’s not until I’ve lost sight of the back of his silver head that I realize it’s gone completely quiet around me. So quiet I hear the old man a few tables over tsk in my direction.

All of my self-confidence tries to wither as I numbly stand and sniff those tears away. Embarrassment is not something that will fuck with me today. Shoulders straight, head high, I only need to hold the act until I’m out of here.

I’m past the staring tables.

Halfway across the dining room.

Almost to the doo—

“Sir. You can’t leave until the bill is paid.”

Fuck.

I glance over at the snooty voice, hoping it’s directed at anyone other than me, but two steely eyes are narrowed my way.

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