Page 36 of Not Dating Material

“You know the way to my heart.”

Xander chews on his painted thumbnail as he watches me hunt down clothes. He’s wearing brightly colored thigh-high socks, a pink T-shirt, and short pajama bottoms with kittens on them. When Xander says he’s cute, it’s true. He makes sure of it. Always.

Considering he never knows when we’re going to be rushing out the door with one of his medical anxiety attacks, he’s always ready, even going so far as to get me to tattoo freckles on his nose last year.

I wanted to talk him out of it, but I didn’t. When it comes to Xander, I can never say no.

“Seven …”

“Yeah?”

“If you did fall in love with Molly—”

“I already told you—”

“Yeah, yeah, not interested or whatever.” He waves me away. “It’s a hypothetical. Let’s say you both fell in love and whatever …”

“You want to know where that leaves you?”

He hesitates for a second before he whispers, “Yes?”

I walk over and crouch in front of him. “Nothing changes.”

Xander’s aqua contacts study me. “How can you know?”

“Simple. I’m not capable of falling for someone who doesn’t love you like I do.”

“Yeah … that’s what I worry about.”

I press a kiss to his forehead. “You know it goes both ways.”

He drops back onto the bed with a huff. “If the thought of sex with you didn’t make me uncomfortable as hell, we’d be the perfect couple.”

I snort. “We’d be the most dysfunctional couple.”

“I guess we’re destined to be bachelors for life.”

And while I might not be dying to settle down or anything like that, I hope it isn’t true. I want to have someone one day. I want that for Xander as well. He, out of everyone, deserves it.

“You know what?” he asks.

“Yeah?” I sling my clean clothes over my shoulder, ready to go shower.

“I think Molly loves me.”

I almost roll my eyes. “You do, do you?”

“Yep. And if he doesn’t, I’ll annoy him until he does.”

“I’m not sure that’s how you get someone to love you, but what would I know?”

Xander’s face screws up. “How else would you do it?”

“No clue.” I shrug. “I don’t think our way of escaping trauma together is for everyone.”

“They don’t know what they’re missing.”

I leave Xander in my room and head down the hall. I’ve got an early appointment today and then a back-to-back afternoon, so it’s going to be a long morning of waiting around until things get busy.

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