Page 16 of A Stealthy Situation

All through college, I’ve been a hookup guy. I tried a relationship once with a chick I really liked, but things just fizzled out. It’s not that I don’t want to find someone, and it’s not that I’m actively looking either, but at the moment, school has to come first.

Scratching an itch is second, and finding someone to settle down with can wait. I figure I’ll either end up with some corporate type, saving the world one rainforest at a time, or some hippy chick who chains herself to trees.

All I know is that we’re bound to have shared interests because I can’t not talk about what I’m passionate about, and what I’m passionate about is usually boring to most people.

It’s why my one and only college relationship fizzled out, and it’s why, whenever I see someone a couple of times and think there could be something there, it never comes to anything.

If we have nothing to talk about, what’s the point? I don’t want a partner just so I can do the marriage and kids thing. I want someone I’m friends with. Who makes life better.

I know I’ll find her one day, but the two women in my course haven’t spared me a second glance, and in a school this big, it’s hard to cross paths with someone who shares my interests.

Until then, I’ll keep focusing on my goals and try to keep my roommates from humping each other around me as often as I can.

“So, family,” I say once we’re all seated and eating. “Guess what we’re doing this weekend?”

“Studying?” Marshall immediately answers.

“Hard no. Frat party. The three of us. And do not exchange that look that I know you’re about to exchange because you’ve both been behaving like an old married couple since we got back.”

“I’ve never been that into parties,” Marshall reminds me.

“No, but Fe’s always been a party animal.”

“That was because I was looking for people to sleep with. The only person I’m sleeping with is right next to me in bed, and I don’t have to get out there shaking my ass for it to happen.”

“I dunno, I’d like a bit of ass shaking,” Marshall teases.

Felix narrows his eyes at me. “A frat party? Really? When was the last time you went to one of those things?”

He’s right. Now that I’m doing my master’s, I feel like the old guy trying to hang out with the kids when I go to an undergrad party. It’s mostly why I’ve stayed away. Benny is a junior, so there’s really only two years between us, but between him being an undergrad and one of those frat bros, we couldn’t be more different.

“I lost a bet,” I tell them. “To a junior in my statistics class.”

“Isn’t that the one you audit?” Marshall asks. “I didn’t realize you were friends with anyone there.”

“The guy’s a math whiz, and I get help from him sometimes. I needed the refresher, but there are still things I don’t fully understand, and Professor Brooks just flies through the material. Some days, I wonder if he realizes he’s talking to a full classroom at all or if he’s just that nervous he’s trying to get the words out as quickly as possible.”

“He’s young for a teacher, so he probably is nervous,” Felix says. “It’s cool you have a friend. Outside of us.”

“Fuck off, I have plenty of friends outside of you two.”

Well, I did last year. Most of those friends have moved away or gone back home after graduation. Those who stuck around, I don’t see as much because I’m busy with school, and they’re busy with life.

As though proving my point, my phone lights up with a message from Benny.

Saturday at nine. Don’t bring anything. When the pledges at the door hit you up for money, just let them know Ben Dalton says you’re on the list. They’ll know what that means.

“Why the frat party?” Marshall asks.

“He’s a DIK, and they’re having one.”

Felix laughs. “A math genius DIK, who would have thought?”

“No offense,” Marshall continues, “but why the hell would a DIK care about you going to his party? Why was that the prize for the bet?”

I blink at Marshall because I hadn’t thought of that. “Umm … good question. To hang out, I guess.”

“Have you hung out before?”

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