Page 35 of A Stealthy Situation

Emmett knows I’ll take his secrets to the grave; help him carry them there and bury them if I have to. It’s pissing me off that he’s keeping our older brothers in the dark though. “When are you going to tell them?”

“When I have a plan for what’s next. You know what West is like. If I go to him and say I’ve been kicked out of school, his dad voice will come out, and then he’ll start freaking out about not being able to fix it. Then Jas will lay down the guilt trip and make me move back and enroll at CU. I’m not doing that.”

Just the thought of Em on the other side of the country makes my chest get all tight. “FU is still an option.”

“You’ve said.” He drops his voice to a grumble. “About a million times.”

“Don’t get snarky with me.”

“You’re starting to sound like West.”

“Fuck off, I’d never be that uptight.”

He gives me a look. A look I’m known for giving. “Then why are you starting now?”

“Because I love you, you … wanker.” See? Even fighting with Em, I’m thinking about Harrison. “This is stressful as fuck. In high school, it wasn’t so bad because people expected to see both of us around, and we were trading from the get-go. Wanting to separate once we got here, and now living together, it’s a lot. Plus, the whole Harrison thing …” I let out a huff of air, realizing Em is right. “Fuck. I do sound like West. When the fuck did that happen?”

He laughs and throws a pen at me. “Exactly. So shut up.”

I love West, but there’s no way I can live with his state of worry all the time. He didn’t always use to be like that, apparently, but after our parents died and he had to retire from the NHL to play dad to us kids, it changed him.

It changed Asher, too, but in different ways. West felt too much. Asher shut that shit down.

It’s a skill of his I’ve tried to follow because the less you feel, the less people can hurt you. Walking around all vulnerable all the time is a good way to be trodden on. Em’s my weakness though. He’s so open to everything that I’m constantly worried about him.

“Fine.” I kick back on his mattress and tuck my hands behind my head. “Nothing changes. If you see him, you play sick and leave, then we’ll go from there. The last thing he’s going to assume is that I have a twin running around.”

“Exactly. Gotta say it, though, you’re kinda cute about this one.”

“Shut up. He’s straight.”

“Yeah, that sucks. Do you really think being friends is smart?”

“I don’t see why not.” I try to shrug, but it’s awkward. “He’s a fun guy to hang out with, and once my stupid dick catches up and knows he doesn’t equal playtime, it’ll be easier. Just gotta wait until then.”

“Is it bad I’m kind of hoping he does sit next to me just so I can check him out?”

That doesn’t surprise me at all. It’d be killing him that he doesn’t know who this guy is. He’s already tried to bully me into online stalking him, but I can’t remember what the fuck Harrison’s last name is. Something that starts with D. I could ask him, but also, there’s a small part of me that doesn’t want Em to know. If he sees Harrison and agrees with me that he’s hot as fuck and validates the horny feelings I’m having, it’ll be so much harder to tamp down this interest.

Maybe one day, they’ll meet. Far, far away from here.

But the more likely option is that our friendship will fizzle out, and I’ll never have to face the awkward conversation of why I’d never mentioned my twin to him.

“No talking to people rule, remember?”

“Who said anything about talking? I said I want to check him out.”

“Check him out all you like,” I answer. “It won’t change his sexuality.”

“Hmm … maybe we should go out soon. It’s been forever since I’ve hooked up, and I’m starting to get antsy. There was a really cute guy at the party you had, but I obviously passed. Hardest decision I ever made.”

While we have no issues with playing fast and loose with our grades, we won’t hook up with someone as the other person. It’s way too fucking weird and gives me the ick to think about men thinking they’ve slept with me and haven’t. Neither of us likes the idea, and it blurs all kinds of consent lines anyway.

So yeah, with Em having been here for almost a month, I bet he’s getting the urge.

It might help calm down this want for Harrison too.

“We’ll do something soon. That bar in Encinitas?” We’ve been out together a couple of times and found a gay bar we both like where no college students hang out.

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