Page 44 of Forgotten Romance

“Look at you,” Art teases. “A regular little event planner.”

“God no,” I shake my head quickly. “But when it comes to knowing what people want and how to market something, I’m your guy.”

Art hesitates over the list he’s working on. “So … that sounds like the type of job that would come with a high consultant fee.”

“I don’t hire out my services, but I know a few people who do, and they make a pretty penny.”

He clears his throat and drags his pen down the margin of the paper. “Could do it from anywhere, I’d imagine.”

Ah. What he’s hinting at sinks in. “Technically, yes. The problem is if I was to take on consultancy for businesses, I’d still need to travel to them. Promotion isn’t just about typing up a plan and handing it off to execute.”

He drums his fingers on the desk, still thinking, and I cover his hand with mine.

“Trust me, I’ve thought about this. You don’t think I’d move home permanently? When Mack first asked for a divorce, I spent the rest of the month trying to find something here that would fit. I was open to anything with similar skills and was even ready to take a slight salary cut, but while this place is getting bigger, it’s still a small town. The opportunities aren’t here.”

“It kills me, you know,” he finally says.

“What does?”

“How two people so perfect for each other and so in love can’t find a way to make it work.”

“Yeah. You and me both.”

I’m distracted for the rest of the hour we’re there, wanting to forget the way Art assumed it would be so easy for me to start consulting. Building that type of portfolio takes work, and while, yeah, working for myself would mean setting my own hours, there’s only so much I can do from the home office.

Where I’m at now, I know these guys. I know how the company is set up and what each person’s strengths and weaknesses are. I know the projects we’ll be implementing soon and have a whole list of suppliers that keep our clients’ costs down because of the regular work we supply. Doing that on my own? Not being there to manage the project?

It’s not that simple.

I came to terms with that realization around the time I signed the divorce papers, but every now and then, I have a tiny flicker of hope that it could be different now. That something might miraculously turn up, but it never does.

The longer I’m home though, the more I remember I miss it. When I’m not here, it’s like this deep-seated part of me goes cold and hollow, and no matter how much I’m enjoying myself with work and my colleagues, it doesn’t ever go away. Not until I’m back. If I hadn’t negotiated all this time at home, I’d likely already be gone again. The thought of saying goodbye to Van and Kiera again so soon makes me want to throw something. I know Mack thinks I’m the villain in all this, I know he thinks I broke up our family for nothing, but I’m fucking stuck, and I don’t have a single soul to talk about it with. We have shared friends, my parents are on his side, and Mack, the one person I want to talk to more than anyone, is biased. His solution would be to quit and work it out.

Like it’s so easy.

But what if I can find a way?

Urg, there’s that hope again.

No matter how much I squash it down, it bobs determinedly back to the surface. And I think it always will while Mack loves me.

So I have two choices if I can’t keep us continuing the way we are.

I either give him up completely, take Art’s offer for a place to stay, and then encourage him to start dating.

Or I go back to figuring out the solution to our problems. And this time, I can’t stop until I find it.

14

Mack

I’m quick as a ninja as I creep into Davey’s LEGO hut and find the container we packed all the pieces into the other day. Do I like LEGO? No. Am I any good at it? Also, no. Which is why I’m enlisting the group to help me the hell out.

The look of horror on his face is something I keep replaying, and the way he comforted me after just goes to show what a perfect-hearted man he is. I’m getting him a Christmas present too, but I figure with how busy we’ll both be in the lead-up to the holidays, especially with him still getting work done from home, he’s not going to get a chance to rebuild this—so I’ll do it for him.

Well, me and whichever friends I can bug to help.

The last thing I want is for Davey to leave for work again only remembering the kids’ meltdowns, me destroying his things, and a hookup I’m worried he regrets. At this stage, I’m doing everything I can to cling to our closeness, to make sure nothing changes from this comforting love we have for each other.

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