Page 63 of The Dark Before Light

I press harder against him, angling one leg between his and twisting against his erection. He grunts. Trembles harder. His fingers dig into my waist. But he still lets me lead. Somehow, he knows what I need.

When a new need arises, I push him backward until his legs hit the bench. Then I gently tug his hair until he sits. The seal of our mouths breaks. I gaze down at him, my hands framing his face. Swollen lips, flushed cheeks, his hair sticking up, he looks at me like I’m his salvation.

He doesn’t know he’s always been mine.

“Take off your pants,” I tell him.

His eyebrow cocks. “Say please.”

I kiss him again, quick and hard, because I can’t resist. “If you do, I promise it will be worth it.”

His pupils dilate even more. “Close enough.”

As he takes care of his jeans, I take care of privacy, flipping the switch by the door to turn on the red Occupied light. The curtain is already drawn, the lights dimmed. Part of me wants to turn them to full brightness. So I can see more. Everything. But shadows are more apt. This is the void of space, after all, and we’re a silent explosion.

When I turn back to Kieran, I almost trip at the sight that awaits me. As it is, I blink a few times in sheer disbelief and wonder.

“I love that look on your face,” he murmurs, “but I won’t lie, it feels a bit awkward sitting here with my dick in my hand.”

Laughter burbles out of me. His answering chuckle ends in a groan when I hike my skirt over my knees, push his legs apart, and drop to the plush rug between them. Dragging my nails up his thighs, I close my eyes to memorize the heat of his skin, the tickle of sparse hair. A slow inhale traps his scent in my lungs.

His breaths grow harsh. “Wait. Let me?—”

“Shut up, Kieran. I already know what you want. This is what I want.”

I gather spit in my mouth, then lick my palms, one after the other. He watches me do it, lips slightly parted, eyes glittering and dark.

I’m suddenly, acutely happy he’s the first man I’ve gone to my knees for. The secret is a treasure, pulsing and joyful. He doesn’t know how important this is, how vulnerable I’m making myself. What it means.

But I do, and that’s enough.

“Equals don’t kneel.”

“I think they do. But only to each other.”

I take his cock in my slick hands, sliding them down until they meet his body. He’s thick, the skin flushed dark with blood, so hard and needy. A vein throbs against my fingers. Pre-cum leaks from the tip. He’s so close already and I love that it’s because of me. Leaning forward, I pump my hands as I swirl my tongue over the broad, flared head. The silky texture makes me moan. The flavor of his want makes my pussy ache and drip.

He chokes. “Jesus fucking?—”

I take him in my mouth.

“—Christ!”

I find a rhythm with my mouth and hands, relishing his needy grunts and the small, greedy thrusts of his hips. When I pay special attention to the vein on the underside of his shaft, he hisses and loses a bit more control. His fingertips graze my jaw, nose, cheekbones, throat. Like I’m priceless art. Delicate and easily shattered.

Silly man, I’m a lion.

Hollowing my cheeks, I take him into my throat and swallow once, twice. His fingers spasm against my head. With an agonized shout of my name, he comes apart. His pleasure heats my throat and fills me with vibrating, liquid power.

I uncurl my fingers slowly, then lick him root to tip, all the way around, until he topples backward onto the bench with an arm over his face. He’s shaking, his chest heaving.

“I can’t fucking see—holy—what on earth?—”

Moving to my feet, I round the bench and brush a lock of hair from his forehead. The urge to cry reappears, almost undoing me, but I smother it. Just a few more seconds.

His arm slips over his head and he looks up at me, eyes unguarded and tender, full of everything I wish so badly were true. The connection is painful, so I focus instead on locking in every detail I can. I trail my thumbs over his eyebrows, down the peak of his nose, across the faint freckles on his cheekbones.

I don’t feel the tear until it falls.

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