Page 27 of Raze

“I used to run on the beach every mornin’, it clears my head,” he points out catching his breath.

“And what does your head need to be clear of.” My thoughts go back to the way he kissed me last night and it makes my pussy start to pulse. After all that happened with Billy, I never imagined I’d ever have the desires I do when I’m around Raze, perhaps that's why this man has me so mesmerized.

“A lot of things. I’ve been thinkin’...”

Shit, here it comes, he’s going to tell me to leave and sleep at the motel and the panic from that thought instantly hits my chest.

“...There’s a get-together on the beach tonight and if you wanted to...” He avoids making eye contact with me and looks a lot like he’s swallowing his pride.

“Are you saying I can go?” I slam the book down.

“That’s what I’m sayin’,” he tells me, keeping his voice stern.

I’m excited for the first time in so long. I actually feel excited. Even when I was living in Sacramento, Kane would never let me hang out at the club. There, I understood why all of the members hated my father for what he did. Kane never trusted that I’d be safe around them. But, here it’s different, nobody knows who I am, and nobody wants to hurt me. I’m safe and the thought of being included in this party makes me want to happy-dance. Though I manage to pull it back and remain cool.

“That run must have really done you some good.” I drop my eyes down to his abs, and the way they glisten makes me want to touch them.

“The club will be quiet today, you can head on up and help out Polly if you want, she’s gonna be busy preparin’.” He shrugs like it’s no big deal and I have to hold myself back from running at him and throwing my arms around his neck.

“I’d really like that.” I smile as I get up from the couch, then shock him when I move toward him and press a kiss against his bristled jaw.

“Thank you,” I whisper before picking up my new purse and making my way toward the clubhouse to help where I can.

I don’t know where Raze’s sudden change of heart has come from but I’m onboard with it. I take the stairs and when I see Saint, or Sinner, sitting on one of the bench seats on the balcony I smile at him warily until I’m sure that it’s Saint that’s looking back at me.

“I’m not like him, you know.” He catches me before I can move past him.

“Sinner’s always been a part of me and although I get to be present more than he does, he’s the dominant one. He decides when he comes and goes and he always causes destruction.” I notice how tired Saint looks and I feel really sorry for him. “My advice to you is if you see him run in the other direction,” he warns before getting up off the bench and opening the door for me.

“I’ll take that advice.” I smile trying to imagine how awful it must feel to not have control of your own body. It’s not all that hard when I think back to a few years ago and the weight of Billy’s body on top of mine.

“You okay?” Saint looks concerned when I quickly take a step back.

“I’m fine.” My heartbeat speeds up when I think about Billy being free to walk the streets, creeping into my room, and crawling onto my bed. He always wore his dirty overalls and it was impossible to wash the smell of oil off my skin afterward.

“I should get to helping Polly.” I fake him a smile before I rush inside the clubhouse.

“Where can I find Polly?” I ask the guy standing at the bar when I see no sign of her. He’s tall, with dark hair that’s shaved at the sides and a little longer on top. His arms are covered with tattoos, and the nose ring he’s wearing is kinda cute, although nothing else about him seems to be.

“Raze know you're up here?” he checks furrowing his brow.

“Raze sent me,” I tell him cleverly. “He said I should help Polly with the prep for tonight.”

“He did now, did he?” He folds his arms as if he doesn’t believe me.

“Well, she’s gone to the wholesalers to get food for the grill. Raze throwin’ this last minute party got her all stressed out so she’ll be glad of the help.”

“Wait, the party was his idea?” I have to admit, hearing that shocks me. Raze doesn’t seem like a party kinda guy.

“Apparently he is, and everyone here’s always down for a party. Strictly no women and kids in the clubhouse though, not unless the women are…” He pulls a smile that matches that nose ring on the cute level. “Ya know?”

“Yes, I know, and I guess I’ll be staying on the beach.” I look through to the back room when I notice some of the other members busying around the big wooden table. They look as if they are dismantling guns.

“What’s going on in there?” I stretch on my toes to look over his shoulder.

“That’s not for you to be worryin’ about.” He steps to the left and blocks me. “If you wanna help Polly, you can wait out here till she gets back.” He nods across to one of the chairs and I take a seat while he steps inside the room and closes the door behind him.

I tap my feet on the worn wooden floor and look up at the clock, wondering how long Polly will be. I was so excited to come up here and be around all the different people that I’m a little disappointed to be left on my own. It’s giving those thoughts of Billy a chance to start swirling around my head again.

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