Page 88 of Raze

“I was in the kitchen preparing some food for when the boys came back from the Reapers’ compound, and I overheard Wrath giving your orders. I heard him tell them about Sonny, he said he was a...” She can barely catch her breath.

“Raze, I knew he had a darkness inside him. It’s why I was so desperate for him to prospect for you, I thought you could put him on the straight, teach him how to channel it. I knew nothing about his betrayal of the club, I swear. You have to believe me.” She grabs at his shirt and pleads like she’s afraid. So, I move to take the seat beside her and place my arm around her shoulders.

“Polly. I wanted to tell you about Sonny myself.” Raze looks down at her.

“He’s dead, isn’t he? He’s one of the bodies they took to the Reapers’ compound..” She looks up at Raze desperately wanting him to tell her she’s wrong. I watch him take her hand in his and lean in closer to her.

“They all had to die, and he went too far, Polly. He was gonna hurt Peyton. He’s been giving the Reapers information. I’m sorry…” he tells her and I can see that he means it.

“No.” She shakes her head and bursts into tears and I wait for her to start getting mad at him. “No. No. No.” She breaks down and I hold her while I look up at Raze feeling helpless.

“Polly, you need to know it’s not what I wanted, but I had no choice, he was a danger to the club and he was a danger to her. He was gonna r?—”

“Don’t.” I cut him off, shaking my head. Polly doesn’t need to know what her son was going to do to me. She deserves to grieve for her boy, and she doesn’t need the burden of knowing that too. It’s strange, but I feel the same way about Kane. I won’t grieve for the monster who did all those bad things to me, but I have to grieve for the brother that I thought I had.

“Please don’t send me away, Raze.” She shocks us both when she looks back up at him. “I know he was bad. I tried to make him get help, especially after I found out about the girl,” she whispers, closing her eyes with shame.

“What girl?” I recall somewhere among all the horror that Sonny mentioned something about him killing a girl and Cliff being involved.

“There was a girl who Sonny liked, he was following her around and was too shy to talk to her.” She takes the glass of water Raze puts in front of her gratefully and continues. “It would have been Cliff’s idea. He never showed any interest in claiming Sonny as his, until he lost all the others, and even then he wanted to keep it all quiet. He started getting closer to him, putting ideas in his head. I don’t know what Sonny did to that girl, but I washed the blood off his clothes the next morning.” She drops her head into her hands.

“I know I’ve done wrong, I should have told you all this before, but I thought you could change him too.” She looks sadly at Raze who crouches down next to her and rubs his hand over her back.

“This is your home, I’d never make you leave and we’re all here for you.”

“No, he was a traitor, just like his dad.” She looks confused by his kindness.

“He was, but you're not. You were just being a mother and protectin’ your son, and if you’re tellin’ me you knew nothing about his involvement with the Reapers, Polly, I believe ya.” Raze assures her and she looks back at him in surprise. “The question is, can you forgive me for being the one who pulled the trigger?” he asks her.

“I always wondered if he’d do it again. I’d panic every time he left the compound, wonder where he was or if he was hurtin’ someone. I hoped, you coming here and giving him that chance, would make him wanna be a better person, but…I’m sorry.” She looks to me now. “I’m sorry that it could have been you,” Her shaky hand reaches up to touch my face and I smile at her bravely.

“I guess you’ve spared me from all that worrying.” She turns back to Raze. “Whatever demon Cliff put inside my boy’s head, he’s free of it now.” She closes her eyes, and not only do I admire her courage, but I take something from it.

“Come on.” I stand up.

“What ya doin’?” Raze stares at me.

“I’m getting dressed and we’re going to the clubhouse,” I tell him.

“Pey, you need to rest.”

“I’ve rested, and yesterday was one hell of a day for everyone. You’re their leader, Raze, you need to check that everyone’s okay. Polly.” I kneel in front of her. “You can’t be ashamed of what Sonny did, you have to hold your head up high and face this head-on. Just like I do. It’s not gonna be easy, but shall we do it together?”

“It’s early, no one’s gonna be at the club after the night everyone’s had.” Raze smiles sadly.

“Well, there might be some stragglers, and I’ll bet if there are, they’ll be hungry. I can make breakfast.” I smile at Polly, who stands up and takes my hand. I leave Raze to continue comforting her while I grab some clothes and head to the bathroom to change. I can’t sit around here all day being sad. I need to be productive.

“You sure you're both up to this?” Raze stops before he opens the door to the clubhouse. He was right when he said it was early, the sun has barely risen, and I guess only having to face a few people at once is a good place for both me and Polly to start.

“Of course, we are,” I answer, smiling at Polly to give her some confidence. There’s no way I’m going to let her grieve alone.

I take a deep breath as Raze pulls the door open for us and when we step inside I can see that Raze is every bit as shocked as I am when we see how crowded it is.

Everyone seems to be here, either sitting and talking all busying around. Alicia rushes over and kisses me on the cheek, hugging me tight and then smiling sadly at Polly before she places her arms around her shoulder.

Raze is distracted, taking in all that’s going on around him. Vike has two plates of food in his hand that he places in front of Saul and Dev, while Tawk tightens the sling that Rocco has his arm resting in.

Saint is attempting to sew up the cut on Sasquatch’s forehead and when we hear a bell ping we look toward the kitchen hatch.

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