Page 20 of The Brooklyn Way

“Good,” I assured her as I studied the menu I’d pulled up on my phone from the QR code.

“Are you sure?”

I brought my eyes up from the screen and put them on my friend and former roommate. “Yeah. Why, Carri?”

“Because I want you to like it here on Jackson Island. I mean, I’m the one who encouraged you to pack up your life and move here. I want to make sure you don’t feel like you made a mistake.”

I smiled at my friend. “I don’t feel like I’ve made a mistake, boo. I really like it here. I feel like I’m coming back to myself. I didn’t realize how much I truly missed sewing until your mom kinda forced me to pick it back up. I’m thankful for her, though. I’m back in my bag. Ideas are flowing. Creativity is flowing. Joy is flowing.”

“You seem happy, but I didn’t want to assume. I wanted to sit down and talk to you about it.”

“I heard you’re making dresses for the debs,” Nyrah commented.

“Yeah. Some of those moms saw the dresses I made for the cotillion and pounced.”

The three of us laughed together.

“Hey,” Nyrah said, “how did your meeting with Journey go that time?”

I thought back to my meeting with the owner of the luxury store. “It went well. She gave me a tour, and we talked a little bit.”

She studied me silently for a few moments, her dark eyes thoughtful.

“What are you thinking over there, Ny?” Carrington questioned.

“Brooklyn, I think you should make me a dress in that fabric with the patterns that make it look like a Lilly Pulitzer. I’ll wear it to work and let Journey see the quality and the way you choose and use your fabrics. I think you would be a good fit for her brand. I can definitely see a Freedom Journey x Spread Love collaboration. I think it would be good for both of you guys.”

My eyes widened to the size of a saucer. “Are you even serious right now? Please be freaking for real.”

“I’m totally serious. How soon can I come by and get measured?”

“Tomorrow.” My jaws ached from smiling so hard. “Come by the community center. I’m set up there. I can get your measurements, and we can go over fabrics.”

The waitress came over to take our orders. When she walked away, Carrington spoke.

“So, you’re getting your swag back?”

It was the softness in her eyes that got to me. “I’m trying. It’s day to day,” I admitted. “I want to be past it, and I’m getting past it, but some days…”I let my thoughts trail off, as I tried to decide whether or not to be transparent. I huffed out a sigh. “Sometimes, I think that if somebody that was with me for over ten years could get over me so quickly, could leave me for a stranger…” I sniffled, tears wanting to flow at the thought of how Vince had treated me once he decided that he wanted Kelly. How he had discarded me so easily and unceremoniously. “Who would want me, Carrington? I was with Vince for ten years. I gave him the best of me. I was the best… homey, lover, friend that I knew how to be. If that wasn’t enough for somebody who knew me in and out, how will it ever be enough for somebody else?

“But then I look in the mirror and see how the weight has fallen off. I see how my eyes are starting to get life back in them. I notice how good I feel when I put on something that I made for myself—all of the seams hit me in the most flattering way and the fabric falls exactly the way it should. I want to do more of that. I want to feel more of that.”

“You will, boo. A breakup after a long-term relationship is the worst.”

“Especially when your ex worked overtime to tear down your self-esteem.” Nyrah took a sip from the glass of water in front of her. “I’ve been there. I’ve had an asshole try to wreck me and climbing out of the pit he left me in was hard as hell. You’re doing really good, Brooklyn.”

Carrington sighed. “You know that before Bryce, I was with Maxwell for five years. You know that man took me through it in every way he could. He broke me and laughed about it. Drove bitches around town in my truck, while letting my calls go to voicemail. Spent my money on his hoes. Fucked them in our bed. Traipsed all over D.C. with them. Messed me up so badly that all I could do was crawl back to this island and move into my brother’s guest house. You know that I know what it’s like to feel unloved and unlovable. I think you’re on a good path. Exercising, sewing… All we need to do is get you to incorporate some male companionship and you’ll be on your way.”

“Cameron’s single.” There was a glint in Nyrah’s eyes when she said it.

“That, he is. And he’s right there, on the same property as you, mere steps away.”

I blushed like crazy at their comments, happy when the server showed up with our starters.

I continued to wear my colorful Lilly Pulitzer inspired dresses, because I loved how I felt when I was all dolled up in a custom fit dress made of pink linen or green cotton or a denim-colored chambray. Wearing pretty dresses was a small thing that brought me joy and after not having joy for so long, having a little bit of joy was like bathing in sunshine. Sewing was also a joy. Instead of strolling through the local Target to find a sense of happiness, I found happiness in the small things in life.

A small smile played on my lips as the final debutante carried the flowing white dress into the changing area for what I hoped was the last time.

“Brooklyn,” her anxious mother gushed, “you’ve been a godsend. When Gabby had the heart transplant last year, we had no idea that she would gain so much weight.” Her voice was a whisper. “Her father and I were so focused on having our baby alive that we didn’t focus on weight gain.” She shook her head solemnly. “The new heart gave her a life, but the new body is killing her. She tells me that she hates the way she looks. She hates the way clothes lay on her. She wasn’t going to participate in the ball… even though she’s looked forward to it since middle school.” She turned toward me, tears brimming in her eyes. “Then came you, with your black girl magic.”

---