Page 39 of Forsaken

Yeah, I was fucked all right. In more ways than one.

Because Matty wasn’t going to be the only one letting Eli win today.

Chapter 14

Eli

“You won!” Matty yelled in exaggerated delight and he held up his hand and gave me five.

“I can’t believe it,” I said with a laugh as my eyes lifted to meet Mav’s. My stomach dropped out at the look I saw there and I found it difficult to swallow after that. I wasn’t sure, but it felt like something had shifted in our relationship this morning after I’d jerked him off. It should have been such a simple thing – a quick, down and dirty act meant to get Mav off and nothing more. But that wasn’t how it had started and it definitely wasn’t how it had ended.

As soon as I’d asked Mav to come with me this morning to let Baby out, I’d sensed a profound change in him…like he was finally letting his guard down and letting me see the real him and not just the parts he wanted me to see. But letting those walls fall had come at a price too, and his vulnerability had made my heart ache. The way he’d kissed me had been unexpected and as amazing as his mouth had felt against mine, there’d been an edge of panic in every brush of his lips. Like he was afraid to stop. My instincts had taken over and I’d begun trying to ease his fear by bringing him pleasure. But his reaction hadn’t been at all what I’d thought it would be.

Yes, he’d gotten off. But I hadn’t missed the whimpers that had bubbled up from his throat. And I’d finally understood that as strong and powerful as Mav was, he was plagued with the same raw neediness I’d been experiencing the night before. Except my need had been sated by the way he’d made love to me, the way he’d held me and spoken to me and told me how beautiful and perfect I was. I just hadn’t known how to give that back to him. But when that sob of relief had slipped from his throat as he’d come, I’d known I’d done something right. The way he’d lovingly washed my body in the shower, and I his, had been proof that whatever darkness had been rolling through him when I’d first woken up had subsided…for now.

I’d been surprised to learn that Mav had been following me and then had turned that responsibility over to someone else, but it hadn’t bothered me as much as it probably should have. Maybe because I was used to overprotective men. Maybe because I liked knowing what it meant. But all of the conflicting emotions I’d been struggling with had slipped away as soon as Mav had told me that being with me the night before had been the best night of his entire life. I’d made the decision then and there that I was going to fight for whatever this thing with Mav was, because every second I spent with him was better than the last. I’d had some great moments in life, but few compared to what I’d found in his arms, his touches, his looks.

“Here,” Matty said as he handed me the magic marker. I wrote a big letter E on the bottom corner of the page and when I looked up, I saw Matty nodding at his grandfather, Magnus, who was sitting in the far corner of the room. The older man nodded back and got up and reached behind his chair.

“Close your eyes,” Matty ordered softly and I quickly complied. I heard some commotion next to me, but kept my eyes closed. I was sitting close to Matty’s bed so I felt his little body shift on the mattress and then his hand touched my arm as he steadied himself. Something lightweight dropped on my head, but I pretended not to notice as I awaited further instruction.

“Okay, open them,” Matty said gleefully.

I opened them to find Matty sitting on his knees, his fingers clasped in front of him. I reached up to feel what was on my head. I knew what it was even before I carefully pulled it off and I couldn’t help the sting of tears that burned my eyes as I studied the carefully colored paper crown with my name on it.

“Oh wow,” I whispered and I didn’t even have to pretend that I was choked up.

“Do you like it?” Matty asked. “I colored it myself.”

I nodded, needing a minute to get myself together. “I love it,” I managed to get out before I reached out to wrap my arms around him. He hugged me as hard as he could and then took the crown from me and put it back on my head.

“Don’t tell Seth,” he whispered, even though Seth wasn’t in the room. “He might get sad. I’m going to let him win tomorrow,” Matty added.

I nodded. “I won’t tell him.” I glanced at Mav who was still watching me with the same look of pleasure on his face. I noticed Dante over his shoulder. The young man was standing in the doorway of the room, but his eyes weren’t on me or Matty. I followed his dark gaze to Magnus who had returned to his chair. I didn’t miss how the older man shifted uncomfortably at Dante’s intense look, but kept stealing glances his way.

I didn’t have much time to dwell on the interesting turn of events because Dante quickly slipped back out of the room and a few moments later, Tate, Hawke and an older woman with long red hair entered. Mav immediately stood and moved out of the way so Matty’s fathers could reach his side. I also stood and walked around the bed to give them space. Concern went through me at the sight of Tate’s puffy red eyes, but when he kept smiling at the woman who was clutching his hand in hers and who had equally puffy eyes, I realized whatever was happening was a good thing and not a bad one. I went to Mav’s side and took his hand when he held it out.

“Bye, Matty,” I said as I gave him a wave.

“Bye, Eli,” he returned as he reached out to hug Tate.

As Mav led me from the room, I heard Tate say, “Buddy, I have someone really special I’d like you to meet, okay?”

“Okay, Daddy,” Matty said with absolute trust.

Mav and I passed Dante, but the young man didn’t look at us as he scanned the hallway. In all the times I’d interacted with Dante, albeit briefly, he’d always had an easy smile on his face…like he didn’t have a care in the world. There was no smile today and as I glanced over my shoulder, I saw Magnus leaving the room. His and Dante’s eyes met for a long moment, and I could practically see the air sizzling with electricity around them. But then Magnus hardened his jaw and began walking the opposite direction and he didn’t once look back at Dante.

I returned my attention to Mav as he led me towards the parking garage. “Do you know who that was with Tate and Hawke?” I asked. I loved that he had yet to release my hand. Many of the nurses and doctors I had met in the weeks since I’d started volunteering at the hospital murmured greetings as they passed us, but none looked at me and Mav with judgement or disdain. Several actually even ventured a smile when their eyes lit on Mav’s and my joined hands.

“Tate’s mom, Layla.”

“His mom?” I asked in surprise.

Mav nodded. “Tate’s father kidnapped him and his older brother when Tate was really little. He never knew about her until Hawke and Ronan found her a couple months ago. They’ve been talking on the phone a lot, but Tate was scared to meet her until now. He and Hawke met her this morning at the airport and were planning to bring her to meet Matty if everything went well.”

“Why was he afraid to meet her?”

Mav’s hand tightened on mine as he said, “Tate’s been rejected by everyone who was supposed to love him. I think he thought she’d do the same thing.”

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