I shut my eyes, trying to drown out the thoughts, but then something else drew all my attention.
It was quiet at first, a slow shifting sound, over and over, then a bed squeaking.
I lay there, unable to move, my heart racing as I listened to the sounds from Jonas’ room. It went on until my cock was hard, my chest rising and falling fast, my mouth dry.
A soft moan nearly took me out, and I finally shoved my hand into my pants, unable to stop myself. I squeezed my eyes shut, my mind racing with images of what he had been doing on the other side of that wall.
I bit down hard on my cheek to stop from making a noise as I came into my pumping fist, my entire body shaking with the release.
Afterwards, I wondered if he'd set his camera up for it.
Over the next few days, there was a tension between us. For once, my mood was as dark as his was, and the apartment was silent.
And for the first time, he seemed bothered and tense.
I was glad.
Jonas deserved to be driven up the walls the way he was doing to me, because now that the apartment was so quiet, I could hear him. Daily. He was constantly moving around in there, gasping sometimes, or moaning quietly because he didn't want me to hear.
He had to be doing it for money. There was no way it was for anything else unless he was a sex addict or something, and if that was the case, he wouldn't have turned Angie down, right?
I spent Friday night on Google, trying to search for him. Checking different websites for cute guy masturbating, slim brunet with brown eyes, jerking off, alone, horny, etc.
All that accomplished was an evening wasted jerking off to other cute boys touching their cocks and assholes and yeah, it turned out it wasn't just Jonas—or maybe it was since I couldn’t stop pretending each one was him. I was a fucking mess.
Realizing just how much guys like him in general got to me, led me down a rabbit hole. I was desperate to touch them while I stroked myself in my office chair. It felt like I was doing something wrong. I wasn't supposed to be wanting to fuck guys suddenly like this, but I did, and I must have always ignored that fact because I liked girls, too. And Jonas was right fucking there, jerking off in front of a camera in the next room. I just knew he was, but I couldn't find him online for proof.
His vids were probably behind a paywall, and I'd never see them. Not that I wanted them to jerk off to, but mostly because I was dying to know what exactly he was doing. Sometimes I could hear a bit of a commotion, like he was walking around, or exercising, but I knew he had a gym membership he used religiously, so I doubted it was that.
I felt like I was going crazy. Like I knew a secret but had no proof of it and worst of all, Jonas avoided me like the plague, and if we were in a room together, he wouldn't even look at me.
The next morning, after another sleepless night obsessing over it, I couldn't take it anymore.
I locked myself in my room all morning to avoid Jonas, then went to the library and studied for the better part of the day. I wanted to go home to rest though, because I was literally exhausted, but I knew I wouldn't get much rest while Jonas was there, anyway. I didn't think I'd sleep easy again until I had my own space.
Sighing, I knew that was the only solution. We couldn't keep living together. It was a total disaster.
Decision made, I packed my stuff and went home to face the music.
But when I walked into our quiet apartment and saw that Jonas' door was sealed shut, I just knew that he was up to it again.
Irrational as it was, fury ran through me. He couldn't just stay in his room avoiding me forever, masturbating or maybe even camming, and just fucking driving me crazy!
I marched to his bedroom door and banged on it.
"We have to talk," I said loudly.
There was a bang, like something fell to the floor, then scrambling on the bed.
"Fuck off!" Jonas shouted breathlessly in response.
Frustrated, I reached for the doorknob. I knew I shouldn’t, but I was at the edge of my patience, and I wanted, no needed, to end this.
"I'm coming in!"
I turned the handle and by the time the door was opening, Jonas was at it, topless, nothing but boxers on, his face flushed red, panting...
I lost all sight of whatever the hell I had been about to say. Was it that he couldn't live here anymore, or that I couldn't?