Page 88 of The Sidekick

Chapter Thirty-One

Trevor

The door closes quietly behind me as I shake in rage. The feeling has overwhelmed me to the point I don’t think I can speak. I see my desk, my computer, and the filing cabinet. Even the damn couch I can’t bear to get rid of because it’s the prop for the scene of one of the best memories I’ve ever had. I couldn’t imagine anything more perfect than what happened there.

I want to trash it all. Break everything into unrecognizable pieces.

She thinks I’m some asshole that would let anyone touch Max like some fucked up gigolo. How did everything get like this? How did it get this far?

I close my eyes tightly, clenching my fists as my heart forces blood to rush through my veins like lava. I try to breathe and center myself, find the clarity I need for this situation, but nothing comes. Nothing but anger and frustrated pain that I can barely acknowledge to myself, much less to anyone else. I have to hold it all inside, or I’m afraid the box I shove every negative thought into will burst wide open, and I’ll be lost completely.

The only good thing I did in this situation was walk away instead of unleashing my temper on her. She has a right to her say. I thought I could handle it. I was wrong.

I’ve done everything wrong. If I needed proof, all I would have to do is look into Tera’s eyes and see the shell she’s become. Max always said she was a bubble of pure light. I’m the asshole that popped it.

My shoulders slump at the thought, remembering how she couldn’t look me in the eyes until she was angry. It wasn’t so much submission as it was a downtrodden woman waiting for another blow to land. How so many shields went up around her, it took my breath away in fear.

There’s no way I can break down that many walls. None. My self-centered thoughts of simply apologizing and expecting her to forgive me right away punches me in the gut. Who does that? The kind of man I despise, that’s who.

I swallow hard as I think over what she said. It’s a bitter and cold pill to swallow, but I have to if I have any chance of fixing this. I’m starting to doubt that I can.

When Max comes in and finds me staring at the couch, he closes the door behind him with a bang. I’m sure he’s mad at me. Who wouldn’t be after the things I’ve done?

Instead of the fiery tirade I’m expecting, I feel an arm wrap around my shoulders as he leans into me. Is it wrong for me to feel comforted by his steady presence? To get some form of relief from the feelings raging through me? I don’t deserve it.

“Now that she’s ripped you down to the right size, are you ready to really start over?” He asks with a sense of calm I rarely hear from him.

I turn my head to take in his serene expression as he stares at the couch. “There’s no way I can fix this, babe.”

He withdraws his arm and turns to face me. “It hit you that hard, huh? Maybe I should come back tomorrow and ask again after your balls drop back down.”

“Max,” I snarl at him, but in typical fashion, he ignores my warning.

“We’re about to become really popular with the girls, by the way.” He throws himself down on the couch on the cushion nearest the door. Never the first or the middle, always the last.

I swear we might as well have the damn thing bronzed and turned into a shrine. We wouldn’t have to worry about breaking the invisible barrier of the first two cushions.

I’m thrown back to the image of them there. The way she teased him perfectly, like she was made for it, working him into a frenzy without much effort. I’ve never seen him respond that fast to anyone other than me. She had him wrapped around her little finger, and she obeyed me without any kind of hesitance.

“Hey, pay attention,” Max claps his hands with an irritated scowl.

I rub a hand over my face and sit in my desk chair, finally looking at him again with my own angry expression.

“Thank you,” he says slowly, rubbing it in. “As I was saying, the waitresses are ready to throw down for the opportunity to fuck you now. Tera just opened the door for them all to think they’ve got a shot.”

Instead of the jealousy I’d expect, he simply looks amused.

“You’re not upset?” I ask, settling back into the chair. My hand automatically reaches down to touch Tera’s computer like some sort of emotional support that makes me cringe. But I keep doing it. Every fucking day I keep doing it.

“About them? Who gives a shit, mi rey?”

Fuck. He just had to call me that. I narrow my eyes on him as my pants get a little tighter in the crotch. He grins back, aware of my reaction and totally unrepentant.

“You’re telling me that you’re ok with them trying to fuck me in the break room?”

Max’s eyes roll, “You haven’t fallen down that road with any of them. I trust you. But if Tera gets the thought in her head that you will, she’ll walk for good.”

All of the humor leaves me in a rush with his words. “I think she already has.”

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