Page 10 of Brave
She shook her head.
“Then you can keep this on you.” He passed her wallet back. “Have fun.”
It was appalling how much Carlson suddenly felt like Ethen as she followed along, her eyes downcast and her hands at her sides, as he led the way into the dungeon. After that, although she refused to look back and check, she could have sworn she felt Danny’s gaze trailing after them.
“Hang on just a moment while I grab my bag,” Carlson said, pulling a locker key from his pocket and ducking into the men’s changing room.
He was only gone a few moments, but standing in the open entryway with the lockers lined up behind her and the dungeon and lounge spread out in front, she found herself struggling with a whole new set of worries. It felt very strange to be standing here, as if she were any other submissive seeking a night of kinky release. It seemed to be getting harder and harder to remember those times before Ethen when she used to come here. She couldn’t even imagine trying to play without him. Was this what Piggy had felt the night she’d participated in Black Light’s infamous game of Valentine Roulette? Back then, Ethen had made it his mission to make her as uncomfortable as possible, just to remind her to whom she belonged and that her transgressions would not go unnoticed or unpunished.
That was the night everything started to fall apart. It was only a few months after that that the Australian whip-maker, Noah, broke into Ethen’s house, setting the ball in motion that would see the Menagerie Master arrested and Puppy thrown into this limbo existence where nothing felt normal or right.
Two more months whispered through her mind, spoken in Ethen’s ominous voice. The shiver that went up her back was every bit the same as the one she’d felt as she’d stood quaking before his steely gaze at the prison.
Two more months and then she was going to leave limbo and be right back in hell, with Pony and Ethen, where she belonged.
“Ready?”
Puppy startled when Carlson reappeared at her side. She quickly pasted on a smile to hide how sick to her stomach she felt. “Yeah. Sure.”
“Would you be more comfortable in a quiet spot or one out in the middle of everything?” His warm hand came to rest on the small of her back as he gently guided her out of the doorway, where anyone and everyone could now see her. Carlson was right. There weren’t a lot of people here tonight, but those who were—Klara, wiping down the bar; an overly pink server dusting behind bottles and glasses; Spencer coming out of his office—all of them staring after her, knowing what she’d done. Judging her.
“Private,” she whispered hoarsely, struggling to keep panic out of her voice.
It was a mistake. She shouldn’t be here. The bartender knew it. Spencer certainly knew it. Was he still watching her? A quick glance over her shoulder said yes, yes, he was. Any minute now she knew he was going to place a phone call to Jaxson and Chase, and then she was going to be loudly, humiliatingly, irrevocably shown to the door.
“Are you okay?” Carlson asked, startling her from the terrifying direction her thoughts were forcing her to travel.
She nodded, anything but okay. “Yeah… yeah sure.”
“Are you lying to me?” he asked.
The craziest tingle ran right up her back, interrupting the shiver that had preceded it. Her breath caught all over again, but not for the same frightened reason it had before.
His tone was so soft, and yet tinged with warning in a way that was at once both frightening and yet oddly comforting.
She shook her head, another lie.
When he abruptly stopped walking, so did she. Reluctantly, she faced him and they stared at one another until his gaze pointedly dropped to her chest. She followed the direction of his eyes down to her hands, where she held them clapped over her heart between her breasts. It wasn’t her heart she was trying to keep working, though. It was her lungs. Her chest was tight; she wasn’t breathing right.
“Are you sure?” he asked.
She stared down at herself. She hadn’t realized how badly she was shaking until she pulled her hands back off her chest and saw the wild trembling that refused to hold still. “I… I don’t like being stared at.”
He beckoned to her with one finger.
Clasping her hands tight over her stomach now instead of her heart, she followed on watery legs as he led her to the nearest spanking bench. Laying his bag on the floor, he sat down on the padded top. When he beckoned again, she crept in to stand between his slightly splayed feet. She pushed hard, fighting to still the distracting flutters in her stomach, this riot of tingling, dread-filled sparkles now spinning inside her. Was this anticipation? It felt like it, and this was something she hadn’t felt in… she couldn’t even remember the last time a look from a man had made her feel anything other than terrified. This definitely wasn’t that. This felt lighter. It rippled as it swept up the backs of her legs, across her bottom and her belly both. It played in her nipples, tightening them into budding peaks that ached to be touched.
“I’m a dom,” Carlson told her. “Admittedly, I’m not your dom, and that’s a very important distinction to make, but I still don’t like being lied to. Whatever it is that’s making you uncomfortable, it’s okay. I get it. You don’t have to lie to me, and I’d just as soon that you didn’t. I want to be able to take every word that comes out of your mouth as the God’s honest truth. Because if I can’t, then I can’t believe anything you say and that makes me very uncomfortable.”
Her hands tightened their grip on one another. Her nipples tightened too, responding to the very nearness of him. The gentle sternness of him.
“Do you want to start over?” he asked.
Barely able to swallow her throat was so tight, she nodded instead.
He held out his hand. “Hi, my name is Carlson Garvey. It’s a pleasure to meet you.”
For the third time tonight, she let her trembling hand be engulfed by his.
