Page 61 of Brave
“Tell me you haven’t told her so,” he said.
“Every chance I get,” the older woman bitterly replied. “She doesn’t go, and she never will. I’ll be stuck with that bitch for the rest of my life.”
“She’s not ‘that bitch’,” Carlson told her. “She’s the only person Cynthia had to hold onto while the two of them went through living hell.”
“Nobody made them go through it,” she snapped. “Nobody made them stay. That was their choice. Every single day they could’ve left but they didn’t. They chose to stay with him and put up with what he did to them. I’ll never understand it.”
“It’s hard for me to understand too,” he cut in, trying to hold onto his temper. “The only thing I do understand is that no one who thinks they have a choice would have stayed. To them, there was no choice. But they clung on until they got through it, and they’re still clinging, because there still isn’t any choice.”
She jerked back as if he’d slapped her. “What are you suggesting, that I’m as bad as he is?”
Spreading his arms Carlson gestured around the room. The overt pinkness of it the juvenile curtains, the My Little Pony bedspread, the childish clothing in the closet. The comforter was that of a twelve-year-old. The stuffed animals should have decorated the bed of a child, and the posters on the wall belonged to a boy band that had gone out of style back in the 90s.
She recoiled, folding her arms defensively as she stared, first at the room and then at him.
“I love my daughter,” she hoarsely replied.
“Your prison is certainly prettier than Ethen’s,” he agreed. “But when you break it down, it’s still just a prison. And she can’t escape this anymore than she could him.”
Snapping around on her heel, she nearly ran Cynthia over in her haste to escape.
Cynthia stared after her but didn’t call her back.
“All clean?” he asked. “How is she?”
“I couldn’t get her to shave her legs, but”—she shrugged—“maybe that’s for the best.”
“Probably,” he agreed.
Pushing open the closet door, she dug around for clean clothes just as the trill of a muffled cellphone caught his ear. Lifting the bedding he wasn’t quite done changing, he found the phone tucked under Pony’s pillow. After a brief internal debate, he answered it. “Hello?”
Half expecting it to be Ethen calling from prison, he was surprised when a woman asked, “Anna?”
“Uh…” Startled, Carlson looked at Cynthia. “She’s in the shower, actually. Can I take a message?”
“Just tell her Lisa from the diner called. I’m sorry, but we need someone who’s going to actually show up at work. If she doesn’t return the uniform by the end of today, we’re taking it out of her last paycheck.”
Cynthia was still watching him, patiently waiting until the woman hung up.
“That was the diner,” he relayed. “She just got fired.”
“Pony doesn’t work at a diner,” Cynthia said, confused. “She works at the law firm downtown. She’s a receptionist. It’s how she and Ethen first met.”
“Apparently, not anymore.” Dropping Pony’s cellphone on the bed, he changed the subject. “Your mom’s upset.”
Looking away, she dismissed it with a one-shoulder shrug. “She’s always upset.”
She had her mask back on. Wondering why he felt so driven to pry, he said, “Do you want to go after her?”
“Why?” Cynthia returned, raising her gaze to his and holding it steadily. “I know how that sounds. But she doesn’t want me here any more than she wants Pony.”
“She’s your mom.” He frowned. “I’m pretty sure she does want you.”
“Not me. Not the version of me that I actually am.” Glancing around the room, she looked into the closet and then down at the pink glitter butterflies on the shirt she wore. She sighed. “I haven’t been the person she wants for a very long time. To be honest, I’m kind of tired of trying to be things I’m really not.” She hesitated before meeting his eyes again. “Am I as awful as I sound?”
“No, honey. In fact, it does my heart good to hear you say that.” He pulled her in close, loving the way her body relaxed into his as he bent to kiss her. It was hard to stop at just one. He swatted her butt before letting her go. “Get Pony dressed. I’m taking us out.”
Hesitating, she asked, “Pony too?”
