Page 18 of Playing For Keeps

I can neither confirm nor deny.

I can only say that you looked

gorgeous in that doorway and I

can’t wait to see you again.

It was true, as much as he wished it wasn’t. Maybe he could make it work. Maybe they could keep it casual and he could ease his way into the idea of them.

He pocketed his cell phone and wallet into his sweats, grabbed his house keys, locking up behind him and heading out for a run to clear his mind. Anything to work off some of this pent-up energy which seemed to have doubled between work and her. Sebastian ran until his ribcage rattled with gasping puffs, hands braced on his knees as he tried desperately to catch his breath.

He’d run past the cafe, which only spurred him on further. By the time he stopped, he’d done a fair number of miles. Every step was a little wobbly, the slight burn of his muscles being pushed a little too far past their brink making every move heavier. Sebastian sank down onto a park bench nearby, waiting for his heart to return to a regular rhythm. The trees had the barest hints of fall to them, and he could sense it in the air. D.C.’s summers were unexpectedly humid, and the moisture in the air seemed to have abated somewhat.

Maybe now that the weather’s getting better I can run along the Mall and not just the sidewalks around my building? It might be nice to sink into the soft, manicured grass and watch people soak up the city. I never did get around to the whole tourist thing.

But when would he find the time?

Daring a peek at his phone, his hands shook along with his whole body. Farren’s response waited.

You let me know when and where.

What could he say? When he had no idea of either. They were gearing up for the end of their suspense date for their SLA and multiple projects they were trying to push through the pipeline before their deadline. Sebastian couldn’t guess what waited tomorrow, let alone next weekend. There were two options: he could ask her to be patient and hope she’d understand, but he’d risk the chance of losing her totally. Or, he could try to make it work. Sebastian could attempt to balance these parts of his life and hope he didn’t come up wanting.

Unwilling to let her go so soon, unwilling to choose, he ignored the message for now.

He made it through the night, exhausted by his run, only taking the time for dinner and some television before he passed out. Morning came with a sharp ringing alarm and the normal ribbon of dread slithering inside his belly.

Sebastian made it to the office on time, kept his head down, checking and rechecking his work before he submitted it. In their daily meeting, he listed off everything he’d worked on the day before and this one. His boss seemed impressed, applauding him for sacrificing his personal time. Andrew praised the quality of what he’d submitted, reiterating it was only a few more weeks, and if they could all rally the way he had, then their contract would surely be renewed.

“We’re down to the wire, folks. I’m spread thin, as I’m sure most of you are as well. In addition to the contract we’re trying to keep, we have the opportunity to develop an app for a new client. I’m thinking of having a little friendly competition between my top contenders. Ian, Rachel? What do you say?” Andrew’s question was unexpected, but not unwanted.

“I—I’d be honored,” Sebastian responded, trying not to look over at Rachel, not to feel the echoes of the last time he was in this situation. Only a different company. A different girl.

“Great! If you could stay a few minutes after this meeting, I’ll get you both set up.”

It didn’t reverberate through him the way it usually would have, on another week, one from before. He would have let those words seep through his bones and bolster him through the next sleepless night and impossible project. Somehow, today, it didn’t have the same shine. Still, this marked one step closer to what he wanted. It occurred to him Rachel wouldn’t go down without a fight, but in his shock and glee at being closer to his goal, he didn’t have the presence of mind to dwell on it.

Sebastian hoped this opportunity wouldn’t make his job harder, an assumption he suspected was imminent, especially when he walked back to the cubicles after his meeting with Andrew and the tension in the room felt thick enough to choke on.

Andrew laid more responsibility at their feet, stressing the importance and size of the contract at their fingertips. Rachel soaked every word up, her gaze intense and focused. Notating most of it, Sebastian worried if he didn’t write it down, it would prove to be a figment of his imagination. This way, there was proof. It didn’t come with a pay raise, just an increased workload. Still, it would look good on his resume. It would be precisely what he needed to edge out his peers. If he landed this pitch, he would be a shoo-in for the promotion.

The urge to share his good news was surprising, and it quickly deflated when he realized he had no friends in this office to share it with. No one was going to be cheering him on here. His parents probably wouldn’t give two shits about it, especially not when it’d been a few weeks since he last called them. The only person he could share it with, the only person he wanted to share it with, was Farren.

So, even though he hadn’t responded to her message about their next date, even though it was letting her into a part of his life, sharing it with her—Sebastian pulled out his cellphone to type up a quick message. She’d still be in class, he was sure.

Sorry for not responding last night.

As soon as I have concrete time off I will let you know!

I got a really promising opportunity at work. It’s not the big one I’m working toward, it doesn’t come with a pay increase, but it will give me the edge when the time comes. I just…

I wanted to share it with someone.

He sent the message, already worried about bothering her, unsure if it was the right move. Sebastian was surprised when his phone vibrated a few minutes later.

YAY! That’s so great! Congratulations!

We should celebrate!

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