Page 32 of Playing For Keeps

Sebastian didn’t notice Andrew was behind him until far too late, his browser still open on the freaking gift he’d just placed an order for, and he was too slow on closing the window.

“Can you see me before the end of day, please?” Andrew asked, though it was less a request and more a notice he’d get reamed out before leaving.

Fucking great. This is what happens when you let a woman get into your head.

His thoughts were less than gracious. By the time he stepped into Andrew’s office later that day, his irritation had grown. It grated like a burr under his clothes, chafing more and more until he felt red and raw. Andrew sat in his executive chair, desk gleaming mahogany with no knickknacks out. The same as Sebastian’s in a way, only more intimidating. The air smelled like furniture polish, starched shirts, and dread.

“Close the door,” Andrew instructed, and the click of the wooden door shutting out the rest of the office was strangely final. His project manager gestured for him to take a seat across from him.

“Ian, I’m going to cut to the chase.” He gave a small sigh, pushing his glasses higher up onto his nose. “You’re slacking.”

The words jolted through Sebastian, his nostrils flaring as his breathing sped up imperceptibly.

“Excuse me?” he asked, unsure he’d heard it correctly.

“You’ve been distracted at work, cutting out early whenever you can. The volume of what you were completing last month has decreased. But now you’re also spending time and work resources on things that have absolutely nothing to do with your job. That’s just unacceptable.”

The volume was different last month because you threatened the renewal of the contract if we didn’t put in overtime hours, you stupid prick. How could he say that? How could he let any of it leave his mouth?

Andrew pushed a paper across his desk, a wall of black text capped off at the bottom with a line and the date.

“I’m going to have to ask you to sign this warning, Ian. Online shopping during work hours… it’s just not okay. I know you know that.”

The muscle under Sebastian’s eye twitched, his jaw so tightly clenched, it was a wonder he didn’t crack a tooth. What could he say when he was blindsided?

“I gave you extra responsibility to see how effective you’d be in a higher position, and I hate to say it but you’re not meeting expectations. I should have given the opportunity to Keith instead. He expressed interest.” The threat hung there, a glistening knife ready to drop.

“With all due respect, sir. I’ve been doing my best, staying late more often than not, taking work home. The hours I put in last month were well over what is stipulated in my contract.” Sebastian tried to keep his aggression from his voice, working to maintain an even tone and unclench his fists where they rested on his thighs.

“I don’t want to hear excuses, Ian. If you need so much extra time to do your job, then maybe that’s not a good sign either. Your peers don’t seem to be having the same problem. I’m going to have to ask Rachel to step up and do the pitch on her own. There’s just not enough time to get Keith up to speed.”

The workload is not the same as mine! They’re working on one contract; I’m doing my regular work plus preparing for a whole new app idea. It’s nearly double!

He grit his teeth, bitter bile coating the back of his tongue. Rage, white-hot and feral, ran up and down his muscles like electricity. One wrong move, and something would get destroyed. The table in front of him, his fist, his career.

“I’m sorry,” he managed, even though he wasn’t. Not even a little. “I’ll do better.” It tasted like vomit, the words acerbic and nauseating in his mouth.

“I hope so. I hate that I’m the one to take this away from you. The bigwigs have to be kept happy, and if it’s not happening, then my hands are tied.” Andrew shrugged a little, leaning back in his chair. “You seem like a good guy, Ian. I don’t want you to lose your job. I’m only trying to help you out here.”

Sure. Fucking-A. Helping, my ass!

Sebastian nodded, rising from the chair and giving Andrew what he hoped looked like a smile, or something similar. Internally, he was screaming, ready to rail, aching to shove his monitor from the desk or chuck the keyboard at the sterile gray walls closing in on him more and more each day.

Just suck it up. This is what you wanted, remember? Got to focus on this over other stuff. It’s okay.

But it wasn’t. Not really. This time, the lie was precisely that, and no amount of cajoling or minimizing what he was feeling made a difference. Sebastian was exhausted. The time and effort, hell just the mental energy that went into trying to get ahead, wore him down. He was concerned that soon, he wouldn’t be able to brush it off anymore. Eventually, he’d reach a breaking point, and Sebastian wasn’t sure what that might look like.

He gathered his things together, aching to leave and so ready for the weekend. Sebastian slung his laptop bag over his shoulder, only to be faced with Rachel when he turned around. The last fucking person he wanted to see right now. She leaned against the wall, lithe and poised, watching him carefully. He’d never paid her much heed. She was competition, but beyond that, she’d done little to warrant his attention.

“Hey.” It was friendly, sort of. Her black hair was pulled back into a low knot, still impeccable after a whole workday, the cut of her suit severe.

Sebastian gave a pathetic little wave in response, walking by her, toward the door, hoping she’d leave him the fuck alone so he could sink into anger and loneliness in the comfort of his own home.

Her arm shot out as he passed her, sharp fingernails gripping his sleeve and slowing his progress. It was strangely aggressive given he didn’t know the first thing about her on a personal level, and they were definitely not “touchy” with each other. Sebastian’s mind was suddenly cast back to his first meeting with Farren and how he’d reached out for her in much the same way, only there was no electricity at this touch.

“Did you need anything?” Sebastian tried to keep his voice even, stop the fatigue and annoyance from leaking out. Her hand dropped to her side, useless, and something behind her eyes seemed to be stirring.

“Come and have a drink with me. I know Andrew’s been giving you a hard time, and you look like you could use it.” It was almost convincing, and for a moment, Sebastian actually wanted to believe she cared. His mouth tingled with the denial he knew he should give, but something inside, a gentle nudging gave him pause. She’d already won. Perhaps this was his chance to actually make a friend. He didn’t have any work friends, nothing to fill his time with outside of these miserable cubicles and Farren.

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