Page 93 of Sweet T

Titus winced. “How can you still be so sweet after all I put you through?”

“I wasn’t. I was bitter, depressed, and on the verge of moving out. Not just because of us, but because I felt like I needed something to change for me. Javy left. Emmett left. Shelly’s leaving. I just felt so alone, like a tire spinning with no traction. Then Evan came. He’s helped me put things into perspective. From the looks of it, maybe you, too. That is why you’re out here, isn’t it? You guys were alone for at least three innings today.”

Titus smiled. “Yeah. I think he’s trying to salvage us. He’s won Pedro over for it. That’s for sure.”

“What did Ev say to you?”

“He told me to get off my high horse and make up with my son... in so many words.”

Tucker grinned. “He’s bold that way. Smart, too.”

“I’ll say. Especially for such a hairy little fucker with a slew of tattoos.”

They both laughed at that, their voices lilting with echo in the warm, humid air. When their chuckles faded, replaced again by the murmuring of cricket-song, Tucker spoke again.

“I love him, Daddy. I’m afraid I’ll lose him.”

“I know, son. I don’t want him to go either... because I’m scared I’ll lose you with him.”

“It’s like Emmett all over again.”

“No. No, it isn’t. It’s nothing like that at all.”

“I loved him too, Daddy.”

“That was a crush–a difficult one. I may have been wrapped up in all things Javy at the time, but Pedro kept me abreast of that situation. The time Emmett spent here early on, we thought maybe he might be the real deal, too. But young love like that is searing, Tucker–volatile. Once he started seeing that Barksdale girl, we knew it was over.”

“I wasn’t ready for it to be.”

“I know you weren’t. I saw you mope over him for years. Truth be told, I don’t even think he’s bi, son. I think he was a teenager hopped up on hormones, just looking to get his tallywacker tugged. You were the first to assist and, therefore, the easy go-to.”

“Shelly thinks the same, that he used me.”

“She’s as sharp as her mother. I don’t think it started out that way, though. Young men are apt to test their equipment together. It’s natural–gay, straight, or bi. Hell, Alden and I came close one day after football practice. Thank Christ we didn’t. I feel certain if we had, we would’ve never been business partners and made all our money. Likely, he would no longer be my best friend or groomsman on Sunday. Anyway, my point is, sex happens–often with the wrong people when we’re inexperienced and vulnerable. It can be a wonderful thing, but it can also wound like a bitch. It’s part of life, T. It’s why I have you. Your mother and I would have never married had she not been pregnant with you. That’s the best example I can give to show you how we’re all in the same boat at that age.”

“Guess I fell overboard.”

“Yeah. You were treading water for quite some time. But that’s not the case now. Evan may have ambitions to go to Atlanta, be a movie star, whatever–but he has feelings for you too. It’s no longer a one-way street. I think you two will work things out. I want you to be happy, but I sure as hell would hate seeing you leave home.”

“He says he wouldn’t let me.”

Titus chuckled. “Well, that ain’t gonna happen. If there’s one thing us Shepherd men love, it’s a challenge. He’ll have a hard time keeping you away. I guess it wouldn’t be the end of the world if you went. Atlanta’s only a couple hours away. Please know this though... I support you whatever happens. I always will, even though I faltered in the past.”

“Thank you, Daddy.”

“You’re welcome.”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.” Titus reached for Tucker’s hand, lifted it to his lips, and kissed it, squeezing. “Thank you for putting up with my bullshit.”

Their hands dropped but remained connected as they continued to watch the water.

“What’s going on with Shelly?” Titus asked. “Roz is probably cussing me from the grave too, seeing as how I let you both slip through the cracks.”

“She’s getting her degree online with hopes for a scholarship to some design school in New York. Something prestigious. I can’t remember the name.”

“Parsons?”

---