Page 130 of Mila: The Godfather

Because I lose my train of thought and my ability to form a simple sentence, and it’s frustrating. I wish I could tell him a thousand things, but I’m too afraid. Even though he’s never been cruel to me, sometimes I wonder if I say something that he doesn’t like, he will lash out at me like others have in the past.

I don’t want to embarrass him. Nor do I ever want to offend him, so I constantly rethink my words in my head before I let the words slip out my mouth.

Instead of saying what I really want to do, I choose the safe route. The polite route. “Thank you for this day and for my books.” I blurt out, holding onto my new books tighter while trying to hide just how much he affects me.

Tell him how you feel… the little voice inside of me whispers.

But when I look around the bookstore and notice we’re not alone, and some women are standing way too close to us, I chicken out.

“Are you happy, Mila?” Riagan’s soft-spoken words steal my attention away from the nosy women, and I look up at him.

God, will I ever stop being blindsided by his beauty? I know men aren’t typically described as beautiful, more like handsome and sensual, but Riagan is all the above to me. I think I’ll never get tired of admiring him.

Thinking about his question, I look away from him and around the store.

My heart buzzes with happiness, yes.

Taking in the tiny bookstore, I realize that this is not a place where you just go in to pick up one book. It is a place where I want to stay for hours. The walls are not white, so that’s nice. They’re covered by soothing colors that are relaxing. There are nice carpets and comfortable fluffy chairs.

And even though I don’t enjoy the taste of coffee, the smell of it brewing is great. I even enjoy the noise. It’s delightful. Classical music plays in the background, giving customers a pleasant experience while browsing for their next read. It’s not overbearing, of course.

Even the small amount of dust I noticed on the display tables as soon as I entered the store is not entirely unwelcome, and that’s coming from someone who can’t stand the sight of it.

That’s how happy I feel today.

How happy I feel every day that I’m with him.

That I’m with… my husband.

Realizing that I spaced out, I smile sheepishly, feeling a bit embarrassed. “I’m very happy.”

His smile is tender as he leans forward, taking a curl and twirling in his index finger. “Good, baby. Now pick out some more to take home.”

More books?

My eyes widen before I tell him. “Oh, these are more than enough.”

There’s a gazillion books waiting to be read at home already. I can’t take more.

“Nah, not nearly enough.” He lets go of my curls, takes the books from me, and strides over to the front desk of the bookstore where the owner, her name is Hailey, is ringing in a customer’s order. I stand back and watch him lean over the counter and whisper something to the owner, and her eyes grow big then fall on me.

Feeling on the spot, I avert my eyes and focus on the tattoos on the back of Riagan’s head.

Ten minutes later, Hailey and two other girls approach us with five bags, filled with books. Riagan takes four of the bags and the last one is given to me by the bookstore owner. “You’re one lucky girl,” she says kindly.

Thanking her, I take the bag and ask her. “May I ask what he asked for?”

I look over her shoulder to find Riagan not far from us standing in the fantasy romance selection. “He asked us to get him every romance book that’s popular right now and some of our own personal favorites. I hope you enjoy them, honey.” My eyes leave Riagan and fall on Hailey as she adds. “He is indeed crazy for you.” She winks before leaving my side and going back to her spot behind the counter.

Holding my brand-new books as if they are my babies, I look at him. I look at my husband as he walks to my side. “What’s wrong?” he grunts. I watch as his eyes turn darker with worry.

He thinks Hailey said something to hurt my feelings by my quick change in mood.

That’s something that I shouldn’t enjoy so much, but I do.

His willingness to cause hurt to anyone he thinks poses a threat to me.

Before he goes off and does something crazy like threaten the nice older woman, I speak.

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