Page 40 of Bound in Promise
Oh, how this man’s opinion can sway me like the wind.
“The last name is Mathers,” I huff like a brat. “It’s so…”
“Plain?”
“Eminem.”
Dante barks out in laughter, and it’s amazing. There’s nothing I want more than this right here. Being this close and hearing his mirth.
“I guess it’ll do,” I sigh. “It’s better than the rest of them.”
My husband squeezes me a bit closer. “Good. I’ll let him know. I also have him forging your transcripts. I’m curious to see how good he is with something like that.”
“He can get me a new identity and passport, but he’s never faked someone’s college paperwork before?”
“It’s not a common request,” Dante replies. “He’ll run them by me for approval before we have to leave.”
And there it is.
A new name for a brand new life in the city I always dreamed of making my own. None of it changes the fact that Dante won’t be there. That I can’t tell him that I’m breaking inside just imagining him walking away from me. From us.
Baring my soul will only make me feel worse and it won’t change anything for the better. It would probably just make things worse.
Dante isn’t going to want to settle down with a twenty-year-old.
I’m too young, too flighty.
Too inexperienced when it comes to how the world works. I’ve never actually lived on my own. I don’t want him to feel like he has to parent me or be a father figure all the time, since my own sperm donor has never stepped up to the plate. I haven’t even heard from my father since the whole Liam thing went off the rails. He must really trust my mother to deal with anything concerning me.
“You’re worried,” Dante states matter-of-factly. “But it’ll all work out.”
“You have so much confidence in me. How will I get on without it?”
“You’re a smart girl, princess. You’re capable of anything.”
Girl.
Not woman.
This shit really fucking sucks.
I nod my head, not really having anything to say. Dante never led me on. No, I did that to myself. Everything I’ve felt or imagined is a result of my own creative thinking. He hasn’t said or done anything to make me think he wants more. My heart has harbored this dream all by itself.
Yeah, we’ve had some great sex, but Dante has his own goals for the future. And I’m sure they don’t include babysitting me for the rest of his life, making sure I don’t fuck things up. He’s already given me enough—my life—and I can’t ask for more than that. I can’t ask that he give up what he wants for himself just to make me happy.
“Why do you look as though you don’t believe me?” Dante asks me. I need to learn how to guard my facial expressions more. I need to get my head on straight.
“I do,” I reply, working to sound as confident as I possibly can. “I have to, right? You didn’t save me for nothing.”
Dante gives me a small smile. “I don’t know, Lucy. The world would’ve been a little darker without you in it.”
I hate how he keeps managing to say all the right things. I’m not strong enough to stand against who he is as a man and how he makes my chest explode with emotion.
Rising from his lap, I regret the loss of his touch immediately and decide to go upstairs to bang my head against a wall several times. “Make sure you eat your lunch. I put a whole eight minutes into that.”
“Victoria.”
My eyes snap shut, but I turn around to face him. I have to get through this shit.
