Page 32 of Mine to Worship

“We have been a great team.”

Her lips arch into a nostalgic smile. “We were until you fell in love with someone else.”

I stand up, walk toward the windows, and stare at the city lit up.

What is Ellia doing?

What should I do?

I am so fucking torn. Do I go to her, fight for her, or give her space?

“I need your forgiveness,” Melanie says. “I won’t accept that years of my life ended like this. When we meet again, if it’s tomorrow or in thirty years, I’d like to have the pleasant feeling that all these years were not in vain. That the years of friendship and everything else had meaning.”

“And you’ll stop?” I ask over my shoulder and jerk my chin at the empty bottle on the table.

She approaches me and tips her chin up.

“These nights have also been for me. I believe we women have also the right to make poor decisions, let our heartbreak out, and behave less than what society deems acceptable. I learned that self-destruction only increases misery. This was the last time of drinking and partying until I don’t remember.”

“Good.”

“You’re hurting. What will you do?”

“I’ll give her the divorce if she wants. She’s better off without me, anyway. It’s bad enough for her that I got her pregnant.”

Melanie cranes her neck and blinks.

“I thought you couldn’t divorce because you’ll––”

“Even if I lose everything, I’ll just start again.” If this is my penance, if this is the only way I can redeem myself, I’ll do it gladly.” For Ellia, I’d destroy any world I built.

“Since when are you a quitter?” Anger glints in her eyes. She takes a step back, and any previous sympathy changes to utter disbelief and disappointment.

My head drops, and I press a hand on the window, supporting myself.

“You wanted Ellia more than you wanted anything in your life.”

The truth of her words slaps my consciousness. There is no point denying it.

“I am a bastard for getting her pregnant.”

She grabs my arms and shakes me. “No, and that kid will be the luckiest child alive. I wish… I am sorry I stooped so low. I was in a bad place.”

I nod, desensitized to everything, and she accompanies me to the door. I give her a side hug and she holds me just a bit more until she disentangles as if she needed it for closure.

“Be happy, Melanie.”

“You, too.”

She waves at me and I bow my head when the elevator doors close.

Knowing her, I’m sure she will overcome and achieve anything.

When I step inside the penthouse, Ellia’s sweet smell still lingers above me. I take off my clothes and change into a pair of boxer shorts. In my gym, I punch the boxing bag until my knuckles swell and bleed. What the fuck should I do?

After a sleepless night, I go in my office and stare at the divorce papers my lawyer drew up. My pen dangles over them. I can’t bring myself to do it, she should have the honor.

Brandon steps inside, approaches my desk, and snatches the papers.

---