“Maybe. And it’s not like I was already hearing wedding bells or anything. I mean, I’m not even sure I wanted to marry him. But I wanted the chance to find out without having the rug pulled from under me again. Why do I never see how much guys like him suck?”
Ellie leans down next to me and takes my hand in hers. “You just want to see the best in people. Also, I think partly you always choose the safest choice.”
I frown. “What do you mean?”
“Before I explain, tell me how you feel about the breakup?”
“It sucks.”
“Go on,” she nudges.
“I hate that this is the second time that I got cheated on.”
“How did you find out?” Ellie asks.
“Taylor told me.”
Taylor works at the museum, and like me, she’s in charge of one of the wings.
“We’re not that close either, but she had my back, and at least this time, I wasn’t totally betrayed by someone I considered my best friend.”
“Why does everything have to come back to him?” Ellie asks.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“You know damn well. ‘He-who-must-not-be named’.” She uses air quotes.
I’ve banned using Jake’s name, but Ellie is right. He does come up often in our conversations, but she has actually never met him in person.
I scowl. “Why are we even talking about him?”
“You’re right, I got distracted. What I meant to say is, why did you go for Derek? Because he gave you butterflies?”
I shake my head.
“Well, he certainly didn’t give you orgasms.” She rolls her eyes.
“And he was weirdly obsessed with Picasso. What was up with those figurines at his house?”
“Those dolls really stare at you when you’re on the bed, going at it.” I shudder.
That earns me a guffaw from Ellie, and I can’t help but crack a small smile of my own. The more I talk about Derek, the more I realize what a terrible choice he was.
“The point is, you only liked him because he was safe. He asked you out, and he seemed like a decent guy.”
“So, now it’s a crime to be practical?”
“It is when it comes to love.”
“Yeah, guess that’s why I got cheated on twice.” I shrug. “Here’s a lesson for me.”
“That’s not what I meant,” Ellie says. “You know that. Kiera, how do you really feel about the breakup?”
“Angry, hurt.”
“Because he was the one?”
No.