Page 3 of Rogue Familiar

“I expect it, Gabriel! I expect it of myself,” Selly practically shouted in his face. She didn’t add that Jadren had expected it, too, had taunted, teased, and jibed at her so that she’d stepped up to the challenge, discovering depths of fortitude and courage she’d never dreamed she’d have. Of course, he’d also called her a child in a woman’s body, one of his misconceptions that lay at the root of why he’d refused to follow through with taking her to bed. “Is there some measure in the world that tells us when our minds have caught up to our bodies?” she demanded. “If there is, I don’t know what it is. There are certainly people out there walking around being treated like adults when they behave like toddlers.”

“An oracle head might be able to make that assessment,” Nic said with a serious expression, though mischief danced in her eyes.

Gabriel continued to ignore her. “All of this argument is pointless,” he said, focusing on Selly. “The reason I didn’t stop Jadren was that he wanted to leave. He was determined, which is why you should respect his wishes. He asked my permission. I had no basis to tell him no.”

“You could have—”

“Hear me out, please,” Gabriel interrupted, waiting until she subsided. “You, both of you, know that I don’t love being in the position of telling people what they can and can’t do with their lives. Yes, I know that’s part of heading House Phel, and I’m resigned to that necessity, but I don’t have to like it. Jadren made a perfectly reasonable request and I agreed to it. Would you have had me say that no, he couldn’t leave because my baby sister has a crush on him?”

Selly flushed, the skin of her face hot and tight. “That’s dramatically unfair.”

“Is it?” Gabriel studied her knowingly. “I’ve learned a great deal about Wizard–familiar bonds and how they affect familiars emotionally. What you think you feel for him isn’t real.”

How crushing to have her feelings for Jadren exposed and pronounced questionable in one blow.

“Gabriel,” Nic said, “recall our conversations about you deciding that you know how other people feel better than they do.”

“Seliah knows I’m right,” he replied to Nic, black gaze still on Selly. “Don’t you?”

She didn’t know. She wished she did. More, she wished she knew what was going on in Jadren’s mind and heart. “How can I find out when he’s not even here?” she pointed out, trying to sound as rational as possible. “Besides, we’re bonded. There’s no changing that, so we have to work this out somehow.”

“Actually,” Gabriel said, “there is a way. And it’s the answer to your problem. Alise has discovered how to sever the wizard–familiar bond.”

Nic made a sound and raised her eyes to the ceiling, as if praying for patience, while Selly stood there, mind and body numb with astonishment. And incipient panic. “But that’s not possible,” she managed to say. If she had any hope of holding onto Jadren, it was this one thing, that they were bonded. She might not be able to escape him, but neither could he escape her. She’d counted on that.

“I thought we’d agreed to keep this information secret,” Nic was saying to Gabriel in a very dry tone. “Given what a political powder-keg it is and the precarious situation of our house.”

“Seliah is family,” Gabriel replied, clearly throwing Nic’s words back at her. “And it’s important for her to know, especially now.”

“I don’t understand,” Selly said faintly, mostly as a stalling tactic. “It’s really possible to sever the bond?”

“It’s not only possible, it’s a fait accompli,” Nic told her, sympathy in her gaze. Yes, Nic might understand all too well how she felt.

“Fait accompli?” Selly repeated, still not quite able to grapple the implications.

“That means it’s been done already,” Nic answered gently. “Alise severed the bond between Asa and Laryn, and also between my parents.”

If Selly had been thinking clearly, she’d have realized before this moment that something had happened there. Of course they’d had to do something about Nic’s maman, rescued from her abusive wizard and recuperating at House Phel. And the healer-wizard Asa’s familiar, Laryn, had betrayed Nic and House Phel in the worst possible way, so naturally Gabriel had been obliged as Lord Phel to deal justice. Selly hadn’t given a thought to either situation.

No, she’d been intent on Jadren, on his recovery. On wanting him so much and scheming how she’d seduce him once Asa released him from the infirmary. She’d been like a giddy teenager, redecorating her bedroom instead of paying attention to important developments, for the love of the dark arts. Now she’d not only lost that opportunity to be with Jadren that night, she stood to lose him forever.

She felt like she could cry, like the silly girl everyone seemed to think she was. That maybe she was in truth.

Gabriel came around his desk, taking Selly’s hands in his. Hers must be clammy because his skin felt hot and dry to the touch. “Don’t fret,” he said soothingly. “Did you hear me? Alise can sever your bond and you’ll be free of Jadren El-Adrel, forever. This is a good thing.”

“What if I don’t want it?” she made herself ask him, meeting his wizard-black gaze. She’d never found his magic-changed eyes distressing or intimidating the way her family and friends had, but now she found it ever so slightly difficult to face him. Not the eyes themselves, but the look of incredulous condemnation in them.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Gabriel said, squeezing her hands just a bit too hard. “Of course you don’t want to be mentally enslaved to someone.”

“Gabriel,” Nic put in, “that’s not how—”

“I know how it works,” he spat at her. “You told me. You would follow me to the ends of the world whether you wanted to or not, because the bonding, or the Fascination, or both, would compel you to.”

Selly hadn’t known that part—at least, not the extent of it—and Nic met her questioning gaze with a shrug of rueful acknowledgment. Now Selly didn’t know what to think. Did she only want to chase after Jadren because of the bonding? That couldn’t be, because she’d had feelings for Jadren well before he’d bonded her. She frowned, trying to trace back the evolution of her relationship with Jadren. He’d irritated her to begin with, annoyed her with all his relentless teasing and jibing. Then she’d seen beneath that prickly armor. And he’d been kind to her. Understanding in a way no one else had ever been.

And he’d sacrificed for her.

And he’d left her.

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