Page 51 of Vipers & Roses

“It depends on how well I go at the Nationals. If I’m successful, I’ll go on to the World Champs,” he says flatly. A fatigue or tiredness appears as he talks about his subject, dragging him down a little.

I ask curiously, “And if you’re not successful?”

“Then I’ll find a beautiful blond with a Glock called Til and pursue her until she says yes,” he says confidently.

I can’t help but smile and need to take a minute to compose myself. “And what is the question? What is the question for the blond with a Glock called Til that you require her to say yes to?”

He places his elbows on the table, holds his gaze with that distinct intensity, and states, “Be mine tonight and every night?”

24

I decided to stay at Cormac’s place, but just as I was about to message him, I hesitated and talked myself out. Now, I’m rethinking as I sit in the sports science auditorium gazing at the cowslick at the back of his neck. This class is always so attentive, hanging off ex-Olympic sprinter Ed Willard’s every word. Still, my concentration is failing today, swinging from listening intensely and jotting down notes to daydreaming about Cormac and his father and the man who fell to his death.

The blond with a Glock called Til. Even though she has dirt under her fingernails from working in the garden, lilac flowers tangled in her hair, and her nose is pink from sunburn, that’s how dangerous I am. Evil laugh. And sexy, real sexy.

My finger twitches over my phone screen, treacherously close to messaging Cormac with a yes. I probably won’t sleep well because I rarely do when I’m in a foreign bed, and for added grievances, he’s likely to snore like a jackhammer. And will he be able to keep his hands off me? It's most unlikely. But I still have this everlasting urge to be held, to listen to the heartbeat of another, and to be told that everything will be okay.

It won’t be okay, though, until I make it okay. It’s down to me. But I can escape into a night of bliss under the guise of make-believe and sweet nothings with the hope of a new day. Finally, I override my apprehension and type: Yes. Tonight.

Our phones are switched to silent in this class, so he may not notice the message until afterward. Naturally, dread arrives like a fanged blob made of acid, and instantly, I regret sending it, but it’s too late now. Unless I make an excuse later on, I don’t want to muck around with Cormac for more than one reason.

My phone flashes Cormac’s name, and I study that cowlick head to see if he turns around before reading the message.

Cormac: Stoked. R u bringing Til?

Me: That was a joke. There is no gun called Til.

Cormac: Sure, Rae.

The class ends, and I realize I’ve barely written any notes, or at least any that make sense. Cormac glances back at me with a lowered brow and a little smirk that hints at the dark satire that lies within. He waits for me at the bottom of the auditorium steps, and his hand finds the small of my back to ease me through the crowd of clambering students eager to head to their next class.

“I might need to borrow your notes tonight,” I tell him, gazing up at the impressive jaw that is always cleanly shaven for streamlined sensation in the pool. “My concentration wasn’t great.”

“No problem. Anyway, I’ve messaged you my address. I’ll be home from training after 8 PM, so you come over any time after then, and we can study for a bit if you want.”

I didn’t hear my phone beep, so I reached into my bag to look. He mentioned over breakfast that he lives in a frat house on campus, and I cringed a little because I’ve never been big on the whole ‘college experience.’ I’m more interested in coming to class and leaving again unless I have a shift in the uni gardens.

“I’ve got to head to my next class,” Cormac adds, seizing my arm and leading me into an alcove free of students, where admin offices are.

Before I have a chance to react in wonder as to where he’s taking me, his mouth has claimed mine, and that mighty body has caged me against the wall. My instinctive reaction is to panic from the confinements of his bodily cage as my chest grows tight and my breath is restrictive. I don’t like being held down, and the hallways stuffed with chatting students only add to my anxiety. I wrestle against my captive, and he pulls away, looking confused. He’s kissed me before, but not like this.

He licks my taste off his bottom lip and whispers, “I’m guessing you’re not keen on open displays of affection.”

“I’m not sure that fucking my mouth with your tongue is categorized as open displays of affection,” I growl, hoping that he gets the message.

He grunts like one of life’s greatest mysteries finally makes sense. “Point taken,” he states, then steps away, and I take a deep breath to calm my nerves. He glances at the crowd of students walking by, then back at me. “But just for educational purposes, is fucking your mouth with my tongue perfectly fine in private?”

My nostrils flare, stifling a smile because I enjoy how his mind works. “Yes,” I answer swiftly, and he celebrates his accomplishment by holding his fist with his big hand.

“I made you smile,” he says, leaning forward to kiss my forehead, “that makes my day. I’ll see you tonight.” He turns his back and walks away, and I wait a few seconds before stepping out into the crowded hallway, still feeling his touch on my lips and his taste in my mouth.

Once I am outside in the fresh air, with the summer heat on my cheeks, my anxiety settles, and life seems less monstrous again.

***

With a bathrobe wrapped tightly around me, I scour my tiny, cluttered closet for something nice to wear. My hand sweeps the skirt of a lemon-yellow floral sundress I bought last summer and never had the guts to wear out on my aunt’s ranch on my day off. It has shoestring shoulder straps, which require the wearer, me, to either go braless or wear a strapless bra. I can’t find my strapless bra, so I'll go braless if I wear this tonight. I bet that’ll get Cormac horny.

I remove it from the closet and drape it over my bed, contemplating whether to wear it. Outside, the sun is falling, and the warm lights from the apartment building across the road are beaming from their living rooms. My mind goes to the elderly lady who had the unfortunate demise of being in the wrong place at the wrong time when the assailant climbed into her apartment. I hope she’s okay and has family nearby to comfort her.

---