Page 20 of Vipers & Roses

Gabe pulls away from the embrace, and I’m shaken awake, slightly bamboozled by the glare of light on my eyes. “I think you were falling asleep,” he smiles, and my legs almost crumble beneath me.

“Sorry,” I whisper as he steps away because I can’t think of what else to say.

He places his hand on his chest and grins, looking down at his shirt. I realize it’s saturated from pressing against my wet tee shirt. I think he thought I was apologizing for wetting him, but I was actually apologizing for being weak and pathetic. “It’ll dry in this heat in no time,” he says, unbothered by it.

“Thanks,” I say as he waves goodbye and lengthens the distance between us.

“You take care, Rae,” he states, which sounds so final. Does that mean I’m not going to see him again? Ever. We’re over before it begins. What am I feeling here? This is odd. My heart is wrenching with every step he takes away from me.

“I will,” I assure him, pretending he hasn’t tied a string around my heart and is now yanking it.

It’s not entirely true that I will ‘take care’ since I’m planning all sorts of terrible things that could cause me great harm. But I must not rest on my laurels and wait for someone else to solve the problem, even though the most qualified person here to solve that problem is the detective, not the drenched botany student.

He stabs me with one last sky-blue glance before disappearing around the bend, and I have to find every ounce of strength not to chase after him.

I remember several hours after he removed the opioids from my hand that I was about to toss back with a glass of wine. I woke up with him sitting beside my bed, staring at the floor with great anguish on that handsome face. That look I’ll never forget because it wasn’t me he was thinking about, yet his pain was real, an internal torture and an ongoing battle. Even though I was tempted to ask him why he was so sad, I knew he wouldn’t tell me. Gabe kept his private life private, and I respected that.

But for that tiny moment, I forgot about my suffering and felt my first hint of freedom without the constraints of agony. Other people are hurting as much as I am, maybe even more. Unfortunately, that moment of liberation didn’t last long, but it was enough to know that life can get better if I give it time.

11

Gabe consumes my thoughts as I slide on the orange dress up to my thighs and then wiggle my ass to get over my hips. I bought this dress at a reduction sale, tried it on once, and threw it into the back of my closet for a day when I have an opportunity to wear it. Gabe consumes my thoughts as I stroke each long eyelash black with mascara, and Gabe consumes my thoughts as I let my golden hair tumble down my back and comb my fingers through it.

Gabe consumes my thoughts as I climb inside my yellow Corolla to go out on a date with his son.

I don’t want a romantic relationship because that would require me to open up and have physical intimacy with a man after two years of avoiding them. Unfortunately…there are those awful things called hormones that sing an annoying song when I find myself physically attracted to someone like Gabe…and his son, Cormac, and, okay, I may as well confess, Blake. Three men. Kill me now.

But let’s focus on the important things. Murder. I will see my target tonight, and hopefully, I’ll be in good view of him to scrutinize his behavior with women. The conversation I overheard in the Olympic pool locker room alerted me to other women being a victim of his roaming hand. This reminds me that Izzie–Isabelle Nelson still hasn’t replied, although I see she has read the message. Suppose she doesn’t want to return to her past by communicating with me. That’s fine. I understand that turning over rocks can be difficult for some people, or maybe she doesn’t care.

The dinner was held at Hargrove Hall on campus, and I took my car to make a quick escape afterward rather than relying on Cormac to bring me back home. This is to avoid an awkward situation, such as him asking me to stay over at his place. I don’t know if Cormac is that type of guy, but it’s always good to have an escape plan.

Pulling up outside the hall, my nerves pummel nauseatingly, and I take a couple of deep breaths to cool the intensity of my fire before climbing out of my car. I’m nervous not just because I’m so out of practice with dating but because I’ll be seeing the Lion again in a completely different scenario.

I spot the impressive frame of my date standing by the door, hands in his black pant pockets, white button shirt tucked into his pants, dressed like his father. I half expected him to wear a suit and tie, so now I feel overdressed in this orange dress that sits low but not too low above my breasts, and the skirt stops just above the knee. The remarkable feature of this dress is the orange color, whereas the design itself is plain. I’m wearing black pumps, the only heels I own, and since my date is 6ft4 at a guess, I can wear them without worrying about being taller than him.

As soon as he spots me walking towards him, his head shoots up, his back straightens, and he steps towards me to take my hand and kiss my cheek. “Wow. You look hot, Rae,” he smiles, eyes twinkling as they run up and down my body.

“You look great, too,” I exclaim as he laces his fingers in mine, and my body tenses a little at his affection. I wonder if Gabe told him about me, but it’s unwise to bring the subject up because then I’ll have to explain how I know his father.

“You seem nervous,” he states as he leads me through the entrance and into the hall lit in golden lights. Several round tables are set, and the alluring scent of salty cooked meat and gravy infiltrates my senses and relaxes my body a little.

“It’s been a while since I’ve been out to a fancy dinner,” I tell him, dangerously close to using the word ‘date’ instead of dinner because I am unsure if he views this as a date. Get real, Rae. He’s holding my hand and gazing at me like I’m the most beautiful thing he’s ever laid eyes on. Or maybe, he’s just horny.

As Cormac leads me to our table, I notice three men deep in conversation two tables over, but his cruel eyes follow me as I take my seat. I bet he didn’t think this would happen. I bet he didn’t think I’d return to haunt him. I stab him a look, imagining holding my handgun at his head and squeezing the trig-

“Rae. Rae,” Cormac says, placing his hand over mine and following my stare.

“Huh?” dragging my eyes away from the dead man. “Sorry?”

“I want to introduce you to a couple of my friends,” he points across the table to a handsome man with slight acne-pocked cheeks that make him seem edgier and more masculine. “This is a couple of my teammates, Josh and Lu.”

“Lu?” I repeat as a memory of the girls in the changing room floods my mind. This is the girl that Lyons asked to do one-on-one late-night training alone, which is a massive red flag that he was planning something. I’ve got to talk to her.

“Yeah,” her smile is tight as she looks me over, “short for Lucy.”

“Nice to meet you, Lucy,” I say to her, quickly noticing that her hair color is similar to mine, and her features are also remarkably similar. We’re not close enough to be twins, but I imagine he might look at her and see me. That thought turns my stomach, and I glance at Lyons’ table again to find his eyes locked on me, watching my every move. I take a deep breath and turn to my date, focusing my attention on him.

“Josh is the only man who has ever beaten me in the 200-meter freestyle,” Cormac states proudly. “That was only once and never again.”

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