Page 46 of Given

I looked at the serving girl who had just finished hanging up all my freshly laundered gowns. I had dozens of them now.

Gowns, not serving girls. Although Laurent had supplied me with plenty of the latter too. He’d given me everything—attendants, jewels, beautiful clothes, blood-wine fortified with herbs prepared by his personal physician. In fact, the only thing he hadn’t given me lately was himself.

A week had passed since our talk after my dream, and I hadn’t caught so much as a glimpse of him. When I asked the servants, they demurred, saying only that “the king is busy” and “the king has many obligations.”

I couldn’t argue with these excuses. Rolund was never around either.

But this was different. I’d offended Laurent, perhaps beyond repair. It shouldn’t have mattered, especially now that I knew he was never going to let me go. That realization should have bothered me a lot more than it did…but maybe I’d known it from the start. From the moment he first appeared on my balcony and looked out at the city with me, I’d known I was in Nor Doru for good.

And now I was at odds with the king who held my fate—my very life—in his hands. Regret was like a stone around my neck, weighing me down and dragging my steps as I paced my room—his mother’s room. Was there significance in his putting me in her chamber? I might never know. Speculation—that word that had landed me in so much trouble—dominated my thoughts.

Before the dream, Laurent had been attentive…and obviously attracted to me. He broke tradition and flirted with war by insisting Rolund send me over the Rift as a thrall. He’d treated me with respect. Stroked between my legs until I orgasmed all over his hand.

And now there was nothing but silence. Undoubtedly, he’d been keeping company with Lord Varick, who was probably pleased with this turn of events. I hadn’t seen the general, either—not since my clumsy attempt at making peace on the Serenity Tower.

But that encounter had also left me more confused than ever. Any time I was near Varick, it was like sparks shot between us. I wanted to keep my distance, but I also wanted to get as close to him as possible. Despite his harsh words and cold looks, he’d been rock-hard in my hand. And I didn’t need a warrior’s superior senses to know he’d meant every word of his threat.

At the memory of it, heat flooded my face. I bore some of the blame for provoking him. After all, Laurent had warned me Varick didn’t like to be touched. I had no idea what possessed me to touch him there. It wasn’t the sort of thing ladies did. My boldness was another mystery on top of a growing mountain of them.

Maybe my isolation was for the best. I was a prisoner in Nor Doru. A bird in a cage and uncertain of my fate. The less I saw of my captors, the better.

The servant cleared her throat, and I realized I was staring into space as she waited for my reply.

“Nothing else, Seda. Thank you.”

She curtsied and started for the door.

“Have you seen the king?” I called out before I could stop myself.

“I haven’t, Your Highness. I could leave a message if you—”

“No no. That’s not necessary.” It would only make me appear desperate. And what if Laurent ignored it?

Once Seda left, I wandered onto the balcony. It had only grown colder since I arrived, but I didn’t mind the chill. Sithistra had always felt overly warm, and now I knew why. I was meant for a colder climate. Every day in Lar Katerin, I felt stronger. Like I could run forever without growing tired.

But it wasn’t just the cooler air that lent me strength. It was the blood-wine. The human blood Rolund had denied me all these years. I’d gone without it for so long I never knew how much I needed it. How powerful I would feel consuming a steady diet of it.

But my newfound energy left me restless…and frightened. It burned like fire in my veins, waking me in the middle of the night. Although, if I was honest with myself, other things woke me too. And they weren’t nightmares this time. There had been no repeat of the strange elf with the bloody mouth and the voice from the Rift.

No, these were dreams. Detailed dreams.

Dreams in which Laurent and Varick were back in my bed and watching me scream my release. Except in my dreams, they both fed me. Touched me. Put their fingers inside me and stroked until I writhed and sobbed.

More than once over the past week, I’d woken with my nightdress twisted around my hips and my thighs spread wide. I’d been so wet and aching between my legs I’d stroked my swollen flesh as those forbidden images paraded through my mind.

It was wrong, but I couldn’t stop it. When the maids entered my room in the morning, I worried they could tell. That maybe something in my face or body gave it away.

Fortunately, Laurent hadn’t locked me in my room. If I’d been cooped up with only a bed and my dreams, I might have gone crazy. But I was free to roam the palace as I pleased. A guard trailed me whenever I left, but he never stopped me from wandering. Not that I wandered far. I was too much of a curiosity to feel comfortable among the courtiers. Although they were polite when I encountered them, their stares followed me. Rowena and Jordan were the only other humans I’d met, and I hadn’t seen either of them all week.

A sigh rose in my chest as I gripped the balcony railing. No matter which side of the Rift I was on, it seemed I was destined to be alone.

“Found you.”

I spun at the sound of Laurent’s voice, barely managing to muffle a squeak of surprise. I pressed a hand to my chest. “You startled me.”

His smile wasn’t the least bit sorry. “I wanted to see if I can still sneak up on you. I thought maybe your hearing would improve now that you’re drinking human blood regularly.”

“It has.” Now that my initial shock had worn off, reality rushed back in. The rift between us was as wide as the one between our kingdoms.

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