Page 133 of Daydream

“You got through to the final ten,” Henry says, my forever voice of reason. “You’re catastrophizing.”

Cami taught Henry what catastrophizing was recently, and now he loves to point out when everyone else is blowing things slightly out of proportion. The irony is that she was explaining what it was to him becausehewas talking about how his natural response to conflict is to spiral.

“If it hasn’t updated when I refresh one more time, I’m throwing my laptop out of the window,” I say, silently seething. “They told me it would definitely be today.”

“Maybe the system is just updating,” Aurora adds. “Maybe their building got evacuated.”

“Maybe Halle is just impatient,” Henry says, causing every person in the room to stare at him. “Fine. Maybe we’re all a little impatient sometimes. No big deal.”

I click the refresh button one more time, and unlike all the other times, the screen turns white. “Something’s happening! Something’s happening!”

About ten people all jump onto our couch to get a look at my laptop screen. It’s a ridiculous attempt to show support, and I know it’s because Henry reminded them all to be supportive, but it makes my heart feel warm all the same.

The white screen lasts a lifetime.

Henry would tell me I’m exaggerating, but it feels like a lifetime.

The portal updates. The tiny box next to my entry that’s read Pending since I found out I’d been short-listed a week ago has changed to Runner Up.

“Oh, I didn’t win. That’s okay; I wasn’t expecting to anyway.”

“Oh, Hals,” Aurora says, and I feel someone’s hand—maybe hers, maybe someone else from the pile of people surrounding me—pat my head softly like I’m a dog.

“You can’t be hot and immediately successful,” Cami says. “It’ll make you too powerful. All hot people need to struggle first to make them likable.”

“She’s right, Hals,” Poppy says somewhere among the pile. “You need humble origins so you can say you never saw it coming.”

“Okay! You can all go back to your seats now. I’m over it. It’s okay. It was a long shot and I still wrote a book, so…”

“Hallebear, can I talk to you outside?” Grayson says after being unusually quiet for the last two minutes. “You, too, lover boy.”

“He can’t ground us, right?” Henry asks as we follow Grayson into the garden.

“No, babe. He can’t ground us.” Grayson stops on the deck, putting his hands on his hips. “Can you not? You look like Dad right now, and you’re freaking me out.”

“Shut up. I’m sorry about your competition,” is how he starts. “Anyway, I feel bad about low-key traumatizing you by calling youthe family manager since you could talk, so, I spoke to Mom and Dad, and we agreed that if you didn’t win the competition that we were going to pay for you to go on the course.”

“Shutup! You’re kidding.” Henry doesn’t say anything beside me, and I immediately panic that it’s because I’ll be gone for six weeks. We barely lasted a month not seeing each other, but this will be different and he can visit. “Are you sure? Thank you, Gray.”

“Mmm. So, Mom and Dad don’t know yet, but I’m moving to the West Coast. I don’t know exactly which team right now, but I have offers on the table. My apartment lease isn’t up so you can stay there while you go to class or whatever.” He looks to Henry then back to me. “But I have cameras watching your every move, so no funny business. I’ll know if my couch has been interfered with in any inappropriate way. And I’ll be back at some point. You promise you’ll look after her? The city is not for the weak.”

“Why are you such a dinosaur? And I ca—wait, what?”

“I’m coming with you,” Henry says calmly, like it isn’t the most exciting thing I’ve heard all year. “I signed up for some summer art classes that looked cool.”

“I”—would scream with excitement if it wouldn’t make Henry banish me—“am so happy right now.”

Russ appears at the French doors; he knocks before poking his head out, his raccoon T-shirt nowhere to be seen. “Sorry to interrupt, guys. We really need to go or we’ll be late.”

“Two minutes,” Henry says to him.

I hug my brother and he reluctantly hugs me back like the pretend grump that he is. “Thank you, Grayson. Are you going to come to the party later? It’s an open bar.”

“No, Hals. Have fun with your friends. I’ll see you tomorrow.” He points to Henry. “No driving if you’re drinking. Got it?”

“I don’t even have a car,” Henry says back.

“Good. Let’s keep it that way.”

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