“Yeah. Why?”
 
 “I temped here.”
 
 “At night?” I grin. “And you had no idea?”
 
 “I remember thinking there were a lot of parties in the penthouse and that it was weird for a building to only have one penthouse.”
 
 “You’re adorable. Did you know that?”
 
 “Fuck you. I’m not the one who sings Moana songs in the shower.”
 
 “Coco. I sing the Coco songs.”
 
 “Whichever. You’re not half as cool as you think you are. That’s all I’m saying.”
 
 I laugh. “I thought I was a badass reporter.”
 
 “That was before I saw you eating colored Goldfish from a bowl last week.”
 
 “I’m a complex person.”
 
 “You’re about a summer away from making dad jokes and flirting with the moms in the pickup line.”
 
 I show the Gramercy doorman my membership card, and he badges Matthew and me into the Penthouse elevator. “Dad jokes, huh? Is that how you see me?”
 
 “Mostly I see you as uptight. Sort of nerdy and…guarded.”
 
 “And you’re not?”
 
 “We’re not talking about me,” he says.
 
 “I’m not nerdy,” I say, heavily resenting that descriptor the most. Uptight—fine. Whatever. He’ll see in about thirty seconds I’m the exact opposite of uptight. “Is this because I wear reading glasses?”
 
 “No. I like the glasses. I’m talking about all those articles you write and the shit you read.”
 
 “It’s not shit?—”
 
 “You know what I mean. It’s not fun either.”
 
 “Fun is relative. What do you read?” I ask.
 
 “Haha,” Matthew says as the elevator doors slide open into the dark lobby with today’s corseted hostess. “Make fun of the ADHD kid. How original.”
 
 I smirk, putting a hand on his lower back. “Ladies first,” I tell him.
 
 He steps into the foyer, and I follow. “Emilia, this is my brother, Matthew. He’s my guest tonight.”
 
 The tall, platinum-haired sex worker checks her list with a penlight. Tonight she’s wearing glitter eye-shadow, and her straight hair is in a tight ponytail. The severity of her features is reminiscent of Lady Gaga.
 
 “We’re not blood related,” Matthew says to her. “He’s adopted.”
 
 I glare at him. “Should I get that tattooed on my hand?”
 
 “Just saying…”
 
 “Welcome, gentlemen. Anything I can get for you?”
 
 “We’ll let you know,” I say before Matthew asks for something ridiculous.