And because I'm an awful person, I'm already looking forward to it.

CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR

RUSTY

Ash breaks into my house Saturday morning and makes me breakfast before I wake. She and Pookie are waiting for me at the table when I get up at 6 a.m. She sits at the table with me while I eat. She joins me on the riding mower while I mow. She comes with me to Granny Belle's house to unclog a drain.

I hardly say two words, but she happily fills in the silence or sits in it with me.

It's so nice, I can hardly stand it.

On Sunday, she shows up in my pew at church. She follows me for brunch afterwards and sits with me and Lola Nina and her husband at the diner. She doesn't push physical contact—much—but she stays by my side the whole day.

On Monday, she skips toward me in the Sugar Maple Farms warehouse at 5:15 AM wearing jeans, cowboy boots, a red-and-white checked shirt tied at the waist, and her hair in pigtails.

Oh, and the biggest, most infectious grin I've ever seen.

I have to fight to keep the grin off my face. I can't let myself get swept away in the idea of us.

She has no such restraint. She plants a huge kiss on me before asking how she can help. Then she proceeds to work alongside me for the rest of the morning. When I load boxes, she loads boxes. When I go to my office in the Nest, she sits there and watches me organize spreadsheets. She listens to my conference calls, watches my Zoom meetings, and gets me coffee. All day, she's my shiny, happy shadow.

I don't leave the farm until eight at night, and she somehow hitches a ride back to my house, insisting that she needs to see Prairie.

"Pookie," I correct without thinking. Then I kick myself.

She rolls her lips together but doesn't say anything.

Pookie ignores me completely. I send Tripp an SOS text, asking him to send Jane to pick up Ash.

Tripp's only response is a "Ha ha" to my message.

So I drive her home.

"Aren't you going to walk me to my door?" she asks.

"Ash, come on."

"It's scary out there! I saw a snake yesterday! Well, actually it was Lottie's jump rope from when she came over to play, but it could have been a snake. Did you know South Carolina has thirty-eight different types of snakes? And like a million of those are venomous!"

"Six of them are."

"Exactly. Those are scary odds. Do you really want to abandon me to whatever venomous snake could be waiting for me?"

So I walk Ash to her door.

And I stick my hands in my pockets to keep them off of her, a struggle made harder when she wraps her arms around my waist, rests her cheek on my chest, and sighs.

"I love you. Thanks for always taking such good care of me," she says. I turn my lips to stone as her breath tickles them. She keeps her mouth agonizingly close to mine while my heart pumps harder and harder and my breath comes faster and faster.

I cannot kiss her.

When her lips make the slightest hint of contact, I almost collapse with want. But I stay strong, reminding myself that I don't get to have her. I can't risk hurting her.

"G'night," she whispers, the words puffing against my skin.

I stand there motionless well after she goes inside.

The next day, Ash somehow finds me at 5:15 AM again, just as bright-eyed, bushy-tailed, and beautiful.