Page 25 of The Coach

“H-how have you been?” I ask, trying to find something to grasp onto that won’t make me look like I’m throwing myself at him, but hell do I want to.

“Not great,” he replies, stepping into the space I just vacated. “See.” His hand reaches out, and I assume he’s going to lay it on me. I brace for the impact of what it will feel like to have his hands on me again, but it moves past my shoulder and lands on a shelf where he braces himself. “I met someone great.”

My eyes shoot back to his from where they had dropped to his throat, watching his Adam’s apple move. “You did?”

He hums his confirmation, his other hand dropping his basket, and I vaguely wonder how this aisle hasn’t had more people come through. Then again, it’s the middle of a school day in a college town, so it’s not like it’s overflowing with people.

“But,” he continues, his other hand coming up to push a stray hair behind my ear. It’s like I can feel my heart stop in my chest, like I’m about to implode from the way he’s both touching and not touching me. “She decided it was best we didn’t see each other.”

My lips pull down, and both sadness and guilt fight to overwhelm me. Oh, and the relentless need for him to finally touch me again. That’s there, too, fighting for dominance.

“That’s too bad,” I reply finally, and he nods his head, his presence just there. All over the place, surrounding me and encompassing me from all sides.

“It is.” This time, his words are quiet, his gaze wanders over my face like he’s memorizing it. “I miss her, and I barely got a chance to get to know her.”

The words hurt and make my heart soar at the same time. How is this possible? How, in the tiny amount of time that I’ve known this man, has he made me feel more than I ever thought possible?

I don’t know.

Instinctively, my hand reaches out, lightly grasping his shirt in my hand, and I just hold him there. Our eyes search each other’s for something, for some sign from the other. Mine search for something giving me the go-ahead, like I need permission from someone else telling me this is okay.

Even if it’s not.

“I—”

“Mick! There you are. I looked in all the wrong places before finding you.” My head whips to the side, catching sight of Vic coming down the aisle toward us.

I snatch my hand away as Tanner takes a step back, quickly gathering his basket.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to interrupt,” Vic says as she nears, her eyes running over Tanner and turning to give me a look.

“Oh, Vic this is Coach Mitchum,” I feel his eyes on me when I introduce him by the name he is known by to every other average college student. I can’t tell by a quick glance if he appreciates it or hates it.

I wave a hand at Vic. “This is my roommate and best friend Vic.”

He nods his head, and she gives a wave before turning to me. “Did Cassie give you a list, too? She just bitched at me to come to the store because you forgot your phone, and she has more she needs.”

I sigh and look at the cart that’s nearly half full of stuff. “What more could she possibly need?”

“She—” Vic stops mid sentence and looks at her phone again. She rolls her eyes. “Ugh, she’s worse than my mother.” Vic answers the phone in a huff, and Tanner shuffles his feet.

I look at him again, regret curling at my thoughts when I realize how badly our moment got ruined.

“I should go,” he says to me, his eyes holding something in them that makes me want to beg him to stay. But stay for what? And in front of Vic, there’s not much more that I can say out loud.

I try to convey my thoughts and regret through my eyes, and I swear his says the same thing back to me as he turns and walks out of the aisle.

“I swear, I’m going to kill our roommate,” Vic says as we start walking again, and I listen to her complain, hoping that it will take my mind off of the utter heartbreak that seems to keep me in a chokehold.

ten

TANNER

The phone in my hand taunts the ever-loving shit out of me.

I can’t stop holding it or staring at it, and it is driving me insane. I’ve thought about what Devon said to me a lot over the last couple of days, and I can’t help but think he’s right.

Despite only having known Mick for a few weeks, she was already important to me. She was a glimpse of a future I’ve wanted for years; she brought hope into my life.

---