“What happened?”
I shake my head, unable to explain exactly what happened because I’m not exactly sure what did.
“I don’t know, he said he was sorry. That he didn’t mean to hurt me. That he wants to make it up to me.”
“Is that what you want?”
Yes. “I don’t know.”
Mom sighs and pats my knee. “I know you’ve had a hard time since you two went your separate ways, but I have faith everything is going to work out.”
“How?” I ask, disbelief so clear in my voice. How could she believe that after everything that’s happened? How could she have any faith left about the two of us at all?
“I know you’re stubborn, and I’m proud of you for being honest about how you feel about it. But sooner or later, you’re going to have to face this situation. The longer you drag it out, the worse it’s gonna be.”
I bite my tongue, my eyes watering just from the vision in my head of Lincoln’s face—his tortured, gorgeous face.
I hate this.
“I don’t know what to say. I don’t know how to act. I—” My words catch in my throat. After a moment, I say, “Forgiving him again feels like giving in.”
My mom sits for a moment, absorbing my confession, the thought that has been on my mind since the beginning.
“Honey, when we love people, the things they’ve done, good, bad, and ugly, feel ten times worse than they are to anyone else. What he did wasn’t good, it wasn’t nice. He absolutely let his emotions get the best of him, but he’s been forgiven by everyone but you.”
“He said some horrible things to me.”
“Because he loves you the most.” Mom shakes her head. “It’s not right, but it’s true.”
“How do I know he’s not going to do it again?”
“Oh, honey.” I turn to look at her, her sad eyes matching my own. “You don’t fully know. But Lincoln is young, he’s emotional. He’s learning exactly how to love you. He just learned early on exactly how to treat you, is all.”
“You mean what not to do?”
She shakes her head. “You may not know this, but I spoke to him a few times on my own. He’s done more behind the scenes for you than you know.”
“What is that supposed to mean?” I ask, setting my soda can down and crossing my arms. “You sound like you’re on his side.”
“I’m on the side that will make my daughter the happiest.”
I swallow roughly and let that penetrate. Just as I open my mouth to say I don’t know what makes me happy anymore, a knock on our old wood door stops me.
“Who could that be?” Mom asks, standing and going over to the door. I can’t see the front door from my spot on the couch, so I listen carefully to see if anyone’s talking.
Mom comes back in a moment later, and I gasp at the basket in her hands. “Wow! George isn’t playing around, huh?”
I smile at my mom and watch her eyes water, looking at me over the rim of the basket that’s filled with flowers, some chocolate, and…a book.
My smile drops slowly. “Who’s that from?”
“You know who it’s from, honey.” She sets the basket down on the coffee table and steps back to look at it.
I point my thumb over my shoulder. “Is he…?”
“No, he was pulling away from the curb when I got there.”
My heart thumps in my chest, and my stomach clenches, just from the mere mention of him being within my vicinity.