Page 225 of The Blame Game

“I’m glad I was wrong about him. I like him for you,” she said.

“Me too.” Shea smiled. “So, when do you leave?” he asked, taking a seat on their makeshift picnic blanket.

“Tomorrow.” She sat next to him and reached for his glass, pouring some of the cocktail into it.

“Way to wait until the last minute to see me,” he huffed, rooting around the bag for his usual chicken burrito with extra guac.

Audra bit her lip. “I know. I kept putting it off. I felt like it would make it real.”

“Were you worried about what I’d say or are you apprehensive about the move?”

“A little bit of both. It’s a big change.” She poured herself a drink.

“And here I thought you were fearless about everything,” he teased.

“I’m good at making people believe that.” She squared her shoulders. “But I am excited. Nervous but excited.”

“I get that. It’s the end of an era.”

“It is. But hey, there are some things to look forward to.”

“Like French men,” he said with a wink.

Audra laughed. “I am looking forward to sampling all sorts of European delicacies. And maybe finding someone more serious eventually.”

“Yeah?” He raised his eyebrows. “I didn’t think you were looking for that.”

“I wasn’t. Not while I was working for Select, anyway. I mean, what were the odds of finding someone who would be supportive of me continuing to work as an escort?”

“Dom would have been, if I’d wanted it,” Shea said confidently.

“Okay, well, he’s apparently a very special man,” she said.

Shea nodded. “He is. And maybe this is me stereotyping but I kinda think the average straight guy wouldn’t be as accepting.”

Audra stared over the rim of her margarita glass. “Who says I would be dating a straight man? Or a man at all?”

“Fair,” Shea said, toasting her. “I shouldn’t have assumed.”

“You shouldn’t have,” she agreed with a smile. “What about you? Have you settled on an identity that feels right?”

He shrugged. “It might still change, but after talking with Dom’s teammates, with the other SAPs … I think maybe queer.”

“Yeah?” She looked surprised.

“I think for me it’s about the person and the connection more than anything,” he said slowly. “And maybe I do lean more toward women overall, but Dom … Dom is the love of my life. He’s my person, you know?”

Audra nodded.

“And bi works and so does pan, I guess? I know some people think they’re different and that’s fair, but for me, they feel pretty interchangeable. But queer kinda covers it all. I’m not straight, I know that for sure. And maybe it started out as ‘gay-for-pay’ but I’m deeply in love with a man so … queer. Queer works for me.”

“Hear! Hear! To queer,” she said, clinking glasses with him.

Shea smiled and took a drink.

“It seems like the whole team is a good fit for you,” she said thoughtfully.

“Yeah, they’re pretty incredible,” Shea agreed. “I mean, despite having to tell my family that I worked as an escort, we’re doing okay. But having this huge, extra hockey family? Well, I kinda love that too.”

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