Page 134 of Believe it or Knot

They’re waiting for me in the car. Sorrel’s in the front passenger seat, her face pressed against the window, eyes closed and lips softly parted like she’s already asleep, exhaustion pulling her under.

I open the back door and find Rafe and Liam smooshed together. The space next to Liam is free and I slide in, putting on my seatbelt, before leaning into my omega. I can feel him in our bond. Anxiety and worry and pain are all buzzing around in his chest. I send him back soothing feelings, reassurance. I need him to believe that we’re going to fix this with Sorrel.

She’s ours and we’ll prove it to her.

On Liam’s other side, Rafe’s purr picks up. I hope Sorrel can sense it even in sleep, can feel it in the air, the gentle vibrations meant to soothe her and Liam both. It’s not long before my purr joins with my packmates. Liam melts between us, his body going slack even as his green eyes stay focused on our girl, on the gentle rise and fall of her chest as she sleeps.

I think all of us are going to be focused on that soft movement for a while, obsessed with making sure it continues.

We’re silent as Gage maneuvers us through the city, not wanting to risk waking our beta with conversation. Besides, we’ve had plenty of time to discuss what needs to be done, plenty of time to come up with a plan on how to win Sorrel back, how to make it up to her.

I can only hope she’ll let us.

Track 33: Apologize

I don’t mean to fall asleep in the car. Truly I d0n’t. I just want to get wherever they’re taking me without talking about anything, so I lean my head on the window and close my eyes as soon as I’m buckled in, pretending to be so exhausted I can’t keep my eyes open. Well, not pretending. I am exhausted. Bone deep.

I need time to figure out how to deal with this. My nature is telling me to just forgive them, sweep it under the rug and part amicably. I hate the idea of any of them feeling upset because of me. And while I’m pretty sure I don’t want to be with them anymore—how can I when they so easily threw me away?—I don’t want to make them feel bad.

I know it was a misunderstanding. I know they’ve had trouble in their past with people using their pack for personal gain.

The Cordova pack has walls as high as a tower and so many defenses. Defenses anyone who wants to be close to them needs to get through. I thought I was getting through them, breaking them down. I thought they wanted me as much as I wanted them. Silly Sorrel.

I also know that I’m tired of just smiling and going along with whatever anyone says. Being agreeable to keep everyone else happy and comfortable. I need to be better about not being a doormat. If I’ve learned anything in the last month with the Stillwell pack, and Apex and the Cordovas, it’s that I have to stand up for myself. No one else is going to do it for me.

Resolve hardened, I let my chest rise and fall in a steady rhythm. Gage, sitting in the driver’s seat, might be able to tell I’m faking. But if he does, he doesn’t say anything, just slides his hand onto my thigh as we wait for the fifth member of our ‘merry’ band to join us.

As soon as Grayson was in the car, I feel the vehicle move. No one says anything at all, but not long after, the two alphas in the back began purring for their omega, cuddling him close, while I feign sleep.

It shouldn’t hurt, but it does. That I’m the one that was taken hostage and nearly blown up, and he’s the one that gets their comfort, their care.

But I don’t know what else I expected. Gage was the only one that hugged me at the police station, the only one who said he needed to touch me. And the Cordova pack has made it more than clear that they don’t want me.

I still have no idea why they showed up at all, why they’re still here. Why would they even bother?

That is the thought that plays on a constant loop in my head as I drift off.

Why would they bother when they made it so clear they wanted nothing to do with me?

I wake up disoriented and achy. Everything hurts. At first I think it’s because I’ve been sleeping in a car, sitting upright, but then I realize I am definitely laying down on a soft fluffy mattress with luxurious sheets and a soft light taupe comforter. The pillow under my head feels like a cloud, and I realize with some trepidation that I’m not wearing a lot of clothing.

Groaning, I lift the blanket and look down at my body. My legs are bare and I’m only in an oversized t-shirt that smells like lemon blueberry cheesecake. I blink at the hand clutching the blanket and realize it’s still got dirt and soot on it, though it looks cleaner than it did at the police station last night.

So they stripped off my clothes but didn’t bathe me.

I suppose I should be grateful that they gave me at least some privacy. I am alone currently, though there is a faint whiff of all of their scents in the air, so I don’t know how long that has been the case. Twisting my head, I cautiously smell the pillow. None of the pack scents linger on the fabric. Or on the sheets and blanket. They didn’t sleep with me.

Groaning again, muscles protesting, I push into a sitting position and look around the unfamiliar room. White walls, pale wood accents, taupe and white bedding and decorations. There’s a dresser on the wall at the foot of the bed with a TV on it, and a little table over to the right in front of a window. Two doors on opposite sides of the room, one likely leads to a bathroom and the other to the rest of wherever we’re staying.

I can faintly hear a TV playing somewhere, on what sounds like a news station by the no nonsense tone of voice, but I can’t make out the words.

Sitting on the bedside table next to me is a lamp, a full glass of water with condensation beading on the outside, and two white pills with a note that instructs me to drink the water and take the painkillers.

The first I do without hesitation, I feel dehydrated as all get out and know I need the liquid. The painkillers I ignore, though, because I don’t know what the hell they are. Not that I think they would drug me or anything. They might think I’m an awful person, but I don’t think that about them at all.

It’s mostly that I was drugged and kidnapped yesterday, and I don’t relish the idea of putting more chemicals in my body.

I regret that decision almost as soon as I stand up, pushing to my feet with another groan. Still, I hobble all the way to the closest door and carefully open it, only to close it again when I find it opens directly into a living space as unfamiliar as the bedroom I woke up in. I catch a flash of movement, so I know someone’s out there. I just don’t know who and frankly, I don’t have the energy to deal with it right now.

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