Page 27 of Chasing his Ex

“Trust...” Her voice rises to a super high pitch. “Maybe you should have a rethink of that statement because somehow I have a child. Yet I gave you a condom, which you obviously removed.”

I now know what she means by that, and why she chose not to tell me. She knows what I did that night, and I’m no better than her. My untrustworthiness created her mistrust in me.

“I’m so sorry, Finn, but it was best this way.” The words stumble out of her mouth. But is she sorry? Probably not.

I fold my arms over my chest. If nothing else, but to prevent myself from touching her.

“Ava.” The sound of my voice is much calmer than it has been and as her eyes meet mine as I comb a hand through my unruly hair. “I need to see her.”

Chapter 12

Ava

It isn’t as though I’m hiding her away from him, but I don’t want him in her life if it isn’t what he really wants. I don’t want her tears if he can’t be a father.

I can never tell him the truth—that would break him.

It broke me.

I can never allow that same hurt to get to Emmy.

He moves around to the other side of the boardroom table, reducing the physical barrier between us, and leans his arms back, setting his hands on the oak table behind him. His expression is still impossible to interpret. He doesn’t look mad, per se, not that he looks happy, either.

My gaze falls from him to the London skyline behind him.

“Just say it.”

I sigh, the realization there is nothing left between us. The love he had for me died that night, and everything since was his own revenge.

I focus my gaze back to him as he stands before me, and my heart sinks further into my chest. His shoulders rise and fall with deep breaths, like breathing is difficult for him. But all I feel is, I’m back to being the stupid twenty-year-old girl. Full of love, but so naïve.

“Why didn’t you try to find me?”

Those aren’t the words I’m expecting to hear.

“I thought it was an immaculate conception,” I say. My tone is accusatory.

“I thought you were on the pill.”

Anger roars through me and before I have a chance to stop, I raise my hand and slap it across his cheek. “Regardless, that gave you no right. I’d been ill the week before.”

His hand coasts over his pink cheek. “I deserved that. I didn’t wear a condom on purpose,” he says, his voice a whisper, and he pinches his lips together with discomfort. “I’m sorry. We never used a condom for years and I was jealous of Noah.” Guilt coasts through him as he closes his eyes and rubs his hand over his head. “I hated you being with him, having sex with him.”

I pull a deep breath as tears burn my eyes. “I know you don’t believe me, but I never had sex with him.”

He opens his mouth to say something, but it closes just as quickly. I can see by the way he stares at the floor, he’s wondering if I’m telling the truth or saving my skin.

“Sorry,” he repeats. “I shouldn’t have been selfish.”

“Don’t be. She’s the best thing in my life. Your selfishness gave me more than you could have ever imagined.” I take a step closer, wanting him near and stare up at him. Shaking my head lightly. “I don’t regret what happened. My daughter, I mean. I know I should be angry with you, but I can’t be because she is my life.” I press my lips together and draw in a breath through my nose.

“And I want her in my life. You can’t keep her from me,” he says. “And I’m sorry, but I feel so fucking angry you kept her from me.”

All I can do is hold my ground as he looks down at the floor and laughs, shaking his head.

“I get why you’re upset,” I say.

Finn’s face twists and he hisses, “Upset? Do you think I’m upset? I’m fucking furious.”

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