Page 28 of Chasing his Ex

“I understand.” My voice is as broken as I am inside. Broken seeing how shattered he is from my betrayal.

But it isn’t only me who betrayed him.

The tension in the room grows thick and stifling.

“Like before, you make decisions. You don’t talk to me, then you disappear from my life to hurt me, and Noah…”

I raise my hand, stopping his tirade. “You chose not to tell me your side of the story. You let me think you were involved in the sex tape and ignored me for weeks. You chose not to wear a condom, you don’t have any right to chastise me.”

“I hate you,” he whispers. There’s plenty of venom behind his tone do me to know he does. I’ve heard the words so many times from his mouth, but this is the first time I really feel them.

My ribcage squeezes my heart so hard it feels it will stop. I close my eyes and nod. “I know you do. You’ve told me plenty of times.” My voice is a hush as I force the truth out. “Just don’t turn your hatred for me onto Emmy. If you want to be part of her life, don’t bad mouth me in front of her.” I turn and walk to the door.

“What’s your mobile number?” I take out my mobile and press the digits into my phone, then compose a quick text to Finn and Stella, explaining Finn can go to the house to meet Emmy at five o’clock but not take her outside.

And a mental note to myself to call Stella with my full requirements.

Finn reads his message and looks at me. “You won’t be there.”

“No, I’ve got a sugar daddy date.” I lie. My knees buckle, the air slamming against the back of my throat, refusing to make its way into my lungs.

He’s crushed, his face full of hurt, and I resist the urge to hold him. Of course I’m crushed, too. Crushed that he hates me and that I lied to him. But as much as I’m the reason for his pain, I can’t forget he betrayed me that night, more than any other betrayal he had ever done to me.

And I know between the two wrongs, we will never recover.

“You need to leave. I’ll text the address later,” I say. I push the door open and step outside and close it, holding the handle as I take some breaths.

I should be thankful … relieved … my secret is finally out. That he knows. I know it’s the right thing for him to know about our daughter, but I know I can’t see him anymore, not while my heart is feeling so fragile. But somehow, the thought of not seeing him again makes my heart ache more than it ever has.

I walk with steady steps to my office and once inside; I close the door, leaning my back against it, letting my shoulders rise and fall with silent sobs.

Chapter 13

Finn

I tap my knuckles against the window in the old paneled door and I’ve never felt as nervous as I do this day, and as much as I hate Ava right now, I wish she was here with me to help with seeing my daughter for the first time.

The door opens and a girl who looks like Ava in the face, though her hair is darker, and she has pale blue eyes where Ava’s are green. But apart from hair and eyes, the two girls are so alike.

“Stella?” I ask. It can only be Ava’s sister.

“Finn, I’ve been expecting you,” she says. “I recognize you from Ava’s university photos.”

I nod and wonder if she keeps pictures of us. “Is Ava home?”

She shakes her head. “She said I have to supervise. I’m tougher than Ava, so don’t think you’ll be getting away with taking her anywhere.”

“I just want to meet her and for her to get to know me,” I say and at that a little girl of between three and four years old comes down the stairs, holding one hand on the banister and the other dragging a teddy behind her. I watch her until she slips behind Stella's legs.

My eyes flick to Stella’s, her face flushes a little. I glance again at the little girl peering from between her legs. Blonde, a mini version of Ava, but her eyes are gray with speckles of green.

Like mine.

I pick up the knees of my pants and crouch low to see her. “Hello, what’s your name?”

“Do you have a password?” her sweet voice replies.

I narrow my eyes as I look at this tiny girl, asking me the weirdest question. “Password.”

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