Page 21 of Miki

Well, actually, he lifted me up, and I just wrapped my legs around him the second time we kissed. So technically, I didn’t actually jump on him, but it wasn’t far off. And deep down, I knew that I really wouldn’t mind doing it again.

Sighing, I pushed that thought aside.

Under any other circumstances, I would be thrilled to see the man again. Unfortunately, that wasn’t something that could happen. The thought filled me with sadness, as if my body mourned his loss. But it would have to mourn. That brief but exciting encounter we had yesterday was all it was going to get.

After all, the guy was breaking into a building. If that hadn’t been enough to tell me he was obviously a criminal of some sort, then the dangerous vibe he exuded certainly was. It didn’t matter that I was hugely attracted to him. Steering clear of him was definitely for the best.

But his kisses! And those lips! That little voice said again.

Seriously! I admonished myself.

No more throwing myself at random strangers, no more kissing them, and definitely no more thinking about their lips!

My body slumped, and I suddenly felt depressed by the thought.

What was going on with me? This was all out of character. It definitely had to be a reaction to all the stress I was under. I was simply going to put the incident with Mr Sexy Lips down to a moment of temporary insanity and forget all about it. And him. Especially him.

Curiosity tugged at me, though.

My police senses were tingling. I really wanted to know why he was breaking into that building. He was obviously a thief up to no good.

Like you? My inner voice questioned.

Shit, my inner voice was pissing me off today. I might have acted like a criminal by breaking into Mathieson’s office, but I was not a criminal, I told it fiercely.

But you stole the secretary’s pass too, the annoying little voice sneered.

Huffing heavily, I ignored it.

Everything I had done was necessary, but it didn’t make me a criminal. I was a police officer; I upheld the law. It just so happened that I needed to break it on this occasion to bring my dad’s killers to justice and expose the corruption that got him killed.

It was hard not to see the irony in that. However, I consoled myself that the end justified the means under the circumstances.

The thought that until a week ago I wouldn’t have dreamed of doing such a thing entered my mind again and I pushed it quickly aside, not wanting to admit that my world was no longer as black and white as I’d believed.

Regardless of my current actions, I was a police officer and so I couldn’t go around associating with criminals. Even sexy ones!

Besides, I was on a mission and didn’t need the distraction.

Although, to be honest, I was lucky that Mr Sexy Lips had been there last night. If he hadn’t been, I would probably have been caught in the stairwell by the security guard. If he had detained me and called the police, how the hell would I have explained things? I had to be more careful.

That was the second time I put myself in danger yesterday.

My heart pounded and my stomach churned at the thought of how close I’d come to nearly losing everything. It made me wonder if doing all of this on my own was the right thing to do. Perhaps I should look for some help. But who? There was really no one I could trust.

Tears sprung to my eyes as I realised that there was nobody in my life who had my back. Nobody who truly loved me. Nobody who was there when I needed them.

God, what I wouldn’t give to have someone to share things with. A man who loved me and who would help me navigate life’s traumas. Someone I could love in return.

But there wasn’t anyone, and dreaming of such things was stupidity.

What about Mr Sexy Lips? That annoying little voice piped up again.

No, not him. Definitely not!

Shaking my head, I swiped angrily at the tears that were running unbidden down my face.

I would just have to do this on my own and make sure I didn’t kill myself or get arrested in the process. Losing my life or my job would not bring my dad’s killers to justice. No matter what, that had to be my priority, and I had to ensure I didn’t mess things up. It was time to toughen the hell up!

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