Page 107 of Adoring Delaney

“Lenox! Take the fucking shot.”

“Tell him to get back.”

“She’s not a threat. She’s holding a—”

“He needs to get the fuck back.”

The baby squirmed, and in the chaos my focus zeroed in on the sound of the infant’s cries.

No fucking choice. I had to. I had one shot to take out the mother and save the infant.

“Carter! Wake up, honey.”

“Take the—”

I pulled the trigger but I was too late.

I fucking hesitated too long.

I closed my eyes against the blast but I knew. I let that innocent baby die.

“Carter!”

My eyes came open, unfocused and I blinked against the harsh light.

“Are you okay? You were thrashing around and shouting.” The concern in Delaney’s voice gutted me.

Goddamn nightmare.

My hands went to my sweat-drenched face and the pressure from my palms digging into my eye sockets did nothing to wipe the visions from my mind.

“Sorry. I’m fine. Go back to sleep.”

Laney was sitting up in bed looking down at me with a scowl, apprehension clear as day in her eyes.

“What were you dreaming about?” I started to shake my head but the lines on her forehead deepened and she squeezed my arm. “You need to talk about it. Please don’t hide from me.”

I didn’t want to talk about it. I didn’t want Delaney to know what I’d done. I didn’t want to taint her perfection more than I already had.

With a heavy, disappointed sigh, Laney started to move away.

“My last deployment,” I started. “I’m…fuck…Laney.”

Delaney scooted down the bed and laid next to me, wrapping herself around me. I wanted to tell her not to touch me, but I’d never get through telling her what happened if I had to look into her pretty blue eyes. I’d rather die a thousand painful deaths than see the disgust.

On an exhale I rushed through the story. Every last fucked up detail. When I was done her tears mingled with the sweat on my chest and rolled over my heart.

“It wasn’t your fault,” she whispered.

“It is. I hesitated. Four innocent people died that night because of me.”

“Four? I thought there was only one Army guy.”

“Our baby,” I spat the words out and my gut twisted with regret and shame. “A child for a child.”

Delaney jerked at my admission and her limbs tightened.

“God didn’t take our baby, because the other one died.”

---