Page 43 of Lost Love Found

“Let’s grab lunch somewhere. That sounds good. And, hey, if you want to come by the set on Monday, we’re filming a really cool scene. I think you’d like it.” Let’s hope that gets her out of rambling mode.

“There won’t be any boobs involved, will there?” She turns to look at me with a smirk on her face. Her eyes flash with amusement and I smile in response. The air between us is tinted with relief as we share a brief laugh, each of us now standing a respectful distance apart.

“No boobs. But you can see what I’ve been training for.” If I tell her it’s bare knuckle boxing, she might not want to come, so I omit that little detail.

“I’d really like that.” Her shoulders are relaxed as we walk to the car and we drive to the restaurant in Malibu in comfortable silence, hair blowing in the wind, the likes of Ginuwine and Oasis now keeping us company.

* * *

We arrive back to Elaina’s with full bellies and the usual feeling of familiarity between us. The sexual tension between us has somewhat dissipated, but I know it's still there, lurking just beneath the surface.

“What else did you have planned for today?” I put away Frankie’s leash and take off my shoes as she sets her purse down.

“Honestly, not much. I was going to do some yoga, order Italian for dinner, and maybe watch a movie.” I nod and tilt my head while she lays out perfect plans for an evening at home. Finally, she catches on. “Want to join me?” And then, as if a literal light bulb has come on, she lights up. “We can finally watch The Notebook!”

I laugh, walking beside her with a hand on her shoulder. “That sounds perfect. Where are we doing this yoga?” And this is the part of the plan I might have regretted if I were a better man.

Elaina slips back into tight black leggings and a hot pink sports bra, her muscle definition stretching the fabric of both. I watch as she gracefully flows through the poses with ease. During our session, we are intimately close, and I can feel her soft skin brush against mine as she adjusts my body into some of the deeper stretches.

I find myself entranced by her movements, and although she gives no indication of being affected by our contact, I can almost feel an electric spark between us. It makes me wonder if this is all one-sided. If she’s just really good at pretending when we need to, but that maybe she meant what she said. We’re nothing but friends. The thought makes my temples ache and I store it away for another time. I want to focus on today.

We order more food than we could possibly need and bring it all into the living room to eat on the couch. Elaina bounces around and puts The Notebook on, and her enthusiasm is contagious. Even I’m excited to watch Ryan Gosling now.

As I watch the movie, my gaze often drifts away from the screen and towards her. A single tear runs down her cheek at a particularly emotional scene, and she openly laughs or gasps at others. It's impossible not to feel a little of her emotions too, and by the time the movie ends, I find myself wiping away my own tears.

She turns on the couch, legs crossed. “So? What did you think?”

“I liked it. It was sad but beautiful.” The smile on her face tells me I answered correctly. “But I want to know something.” Her eyes widen as she waits for my question. “Have you ever watched any of my movies with this kind of enthusiasm?”

She smiles, looking down at her lap, and I prepare to hear that she hasn’t watched any of my movies. “Yes.” She clears her throat and looks up, not meeting my eyes. “I’ve watched every single one of your movies with this level of enthusiasm. Most of them more than once, actually, and quite a few of them recently.”

I pull her closer to me, setting her legs on my lap, and lower my face so she’ll meet my eyes. “You’ve watched all of my movies?” She nods. “More than once?” My voice is high, and she giggles, nodding again. “I don’t know what to say.” I pause, amazed at her admission. “Why recently?”

She gently smiles, her eyelids fluttering a little before she leans her head back against the couch, closing her eyes as she speaks. “Sometimes because I missed you. Sometimes because I wanted to see you before I knew you. But really, I think…” Her voice trails off and she opens her eyes, gazing down at her folded hands in her lap. Taking a deep breath, she raises her gaze to meet mine and blushes as she continues. “I think I just wanted to feel closer to you.” She gives a small shrug before biting her bottom lip in shyness. Fuck, this girl drives me crazy.

She swallows and closes her eyes again briefly. “Have you… um… ever watched anything I’ve worked on?” She bites her lip again, looking down at her lap.

I move closer to her, taking her face in my hands so she can see my face when I answer her. “Every single thing, Lainey. More than once. All of them recently.”

Looking into my eyes, she whispers, “Why?”

I brush the hair off her face tracing her nose, lips and jaw with my fingertip. “Because I want to know every part of you. Because you matter to me. Because what’s important to you is important to me.”

Her eyes fill with tears, and she takes a quick breath in through her mouth. “Thank you for telling me.” I wipe the tears from her cheeks with the pads of my thumbs. “I should get some sleep, and you too.” She kisses my cheek and lifts herself off of the couch. “Goodnight, Adam.”

“‘Night, L.”

I sit there for a long time, replaying the last ten minutes in my head. Her words, the way she bit her lip, how her eyes filled with tears. Why did I agree to be just friends? Why won’t she give in to this? We nearly kissed twice today. Away from prying eyes and cameras. This pull between us isn’t just for show and as much as I want to, I’m having a hard time understanding her reservations. I want her. I want all of her.

18

is that adam or river?

elaina

There is no sleep happening in my bed tonight. None. I was certain my confession that I've watched all of his movies would be one-sided. I was not expecting him to admit the same thing. I wasn't prepared for I want to know every part of you. You matter to me. What’s important to you is important to me.

Maybe there’s something to be explored here. Even if it’s temporary. Even if it’s just for the duration of this fake relationship, because it’s getting harder and harder to draw the line between what’s real and what’s pretend. My body is pulled to his in a way I know I’ve never felt before and my brain fights with it daily, not wanting to ruin a perfectly good friendship. But can we be friends with this much tension between us? Wouldn’t it be better to just see where this goes then to live forever in this game of tug of war?

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