Page 94 of Bad Situation

I seethe, “This is different. You have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“What’s your name? Have I asked you your name?”

I look over and my dad, who’s lost inside his mind and is as confused as always, oblivious to the world around him. His brows are puckered and he’s gazing at the woman I didn’t think I could ever say no to, but I might’ve just found the first reason.

I can tell by the look on Jen’s face this isn’t the first time she’s answered this question. Her eyes become glassy again and I have to give it to her, she answers like she has all the patience in the world. “It’s okay, Sam. My name is Jen. I’m a friend of Eli’s.”

My dad’s face lights with realization that only lasts for mere moments—moments the rest of us hang our hearts on, savoring them like a drop of water from Jesus himself. “Ah. Elijah. I named my boy after him. He’s a miracle worker. Couldn’t love him more.”

I drop my head and squeeze my eyes shut and I’m filled with nothing but fucking guilt for missing his last years because, now, he’s gone. There’re times I’d rather not have glimpses like this—they only hurt more when they disappear.

“Of course, he’s the miracle worker and yet he’s never here. I was only named after the mother of Isaac,” Sarah huffs the way she always does when she talks about our parents picking our names from the Bible.

“Sarah is mentioned in the Bible more than Mary, the mother of Jesus. We picked carefully—stop acting like you’re five,” my mother bites. Given her tone, I wouldn’t be surprised if she gets out the wooden spoon.

“Is it my turn?”

And just like that, it’s over. He’s gone.

“You sit here and play with your grandpa.” I open my eyes to see Jen setting Simon down on his knees where he starts spreading his dominos around and my dad’s back to contemplating everything and figuring out nothing.

Jen grabs her bag and digs inside as she walks through debris and other shit from the fire my dad started when he tried to make eggs yesterday morning and forgot what he was doing. Mom had only left him for five minutes. He’s taken such a turn recently, there’s no way he can be by himself anymore.

Jen clears her throat and starts handing out business cards to everyone. “Call me and I’ll make sure all the arrangements are made.” She turns to my mom and Sarah and grabs my mom’s hand, holding it tight. Damn if that doesn’t make me hungry for her touch. “It was lovely to meet you, Bonnie. My attorney will be contacting you to see what he can do to help with your insurance company.”

Fucking great.

My mother nods and tears up. She’s so damn emotional and carries guilt she has no business carrying. More than anything, she wants my dad here and not in some nursing facility. Not that they can afford that. Jen turns on her heel and pins me with her eyes. They’re full of pain and that slays me to the core.

She drops her gaze to the worn carpet below her feet and moves around me, not having a choice but to brush her shoulder against my chest from the lack of space. When I hear the storm door slam, I turn and follow.

“Jen!” I yell, but she’s already climbing into her Merc. I’m able to grab her door before she can slam it in my face. “Wait.”

Her eyes cut to me. “You’ve made it very clear where I stand, Elijah.”

I put myself between her and the door. She has to listen. “I can’t deal with all of that,” I tip my head toward the house, “and you at the same time.”

Her eyes widen and she yanks her seatbelt. “Well, then it’s good you won’t have to worry about me anymore.”

Shit. “That’s not what I meant and you know it. Get out and let me talk to you.”

She turns to her security guard. “Drive.”

“No!” I yell but have to jump back as he puts the car in gear and screeches off into the literal fucking sunset, the door slamming on its own from the force of the moving car.

“Dammit!” I yell, running my hand through my hair.

“Uncle Eli?”

I exhale and turn around to see Simon. “Yeah?”

“Her boots are weird. Will you throw the ball with me?”

I let my head fall and shake my head. “Sure, bud. Go get it.”

I watch my four-year-old nephew run into the house.

My fucking life.

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