Page 17 of Beautiful Life

“Okay, see you tonight. I won’t mention you’re coming. I can totally play it cool.”

“Great,” I mutter, thinking there’s no way Gabby will be able to play it cool. I turn my attention back to my acquisition case, hoping it’s easier to figure out than Leigh.

Chapter 5 – What Ifs

About a week before Christmas

Leigh

“Yes, I’ll let you know if her oxygen level dips again. She’s been stable for the past hour-and-a-half. Thanks.” I pause to take a breath. “Yes, it’s good to be back.”

I hang up the phone with the doctor and look back to the chart in front of me. It’s my first day back. It’s been three years, but how could I forget how busy this is? Last week I went through orientation, shadowed in the ICU where I used to work, and started back today.

I finish with my chart as it’s time to see to my other patient. A lot of the same nurses I worked with three years ago are still here. They’ve all been welcoming, but I think it has something to do with them being short staffed.

The last few weeks have been … well … not terrible. Tony has made himself a fixture in my life, whether I wanted him in it or not. And I’ve let myself take from him since Thanksgiving weekend when he worked his way into my bed. I thought for sure he wouldn’t come back after Jude and Gabby got home from Colorado, but there he was. I tried my best to push him away, but he wouldn’t allow it.

All those weeks ago after more Sex in the City, I took myself to bed barely offering a goodnight to everyone. I was settled in bed when Tony shocked me more than he’s ever shocked me. I was trying to find sleep when he barged into my bedroom uninvited, sauntered in wearing no shirt and a pair of loose pajama pants that fit low on his hips and walked to the side of my bed. “Move over.”

“What are you doing?” I asked, almost breathless from seeing how great his pajama pants hung on his hips, his lean, muscular chest bare and his hair messy, probably from pulling a shirt over his head.

“Move,” he repeats. “We’re going to try something.”

“What are you talking about?”

Even though I hadn’t moved, he pulled the covers back and climbed in. “You slept like the dead last night for the few hours I was here. We’re going to see if it works again.”

At that point I didn’t have a choice but to move since he was pushing me. My voice became more panicked. “You’re not sleeping here!”

“Consider it an experiment,” he informed me, as if he is telling me it was supposed to be cloudy tomorrow.

“No! We’re not experimenting.”

“Yes, we are.”

“Stop it, you need to leave. Now.” I was in my panties and an old tank top—barely dressed.

Tony, who was in my bed, leaned up on an elbow and put his hand behind my head, pulling me toward to him. “Relax. The thought of going home tonight and leaving you to your dreams just about did me in. Let’s see if you still dream sleeping next to me. If you don’t, terrific. If you do, I’m here. But there’s no way I can lay my head down ten minutes away wondering if you’re battling those demons by yourself.” I tried to pull away but he didn’t let me. “Experiment with me, gem. Please.”

I let out an audible breath because I didn’t think there was any way I could get him to leave. “Fine.”

I scooted down in my bed, pushing Mia out of the way and moved as far away from him as I could. That didn’t work because Tony moved in behind me, turned me to him and put his arms around me even though I was stiff a board. Then, just like the night before, he ran his hand down my thigh to my knee, pulling my bare leg up and over his hip, settling us in. My leg that had goose bumps from his touch.

His lips came to my forehead. “Go to sleep.”

I realized there was no way he was going to give me my space. He’s one persistent guy. I pulled in a breath, tried to relax, and settled in. It really wasn’t as hard as I thought it might be since he was pulling his fingers through my hair. I started to feel myself melt away and quicker than normal, I was out.

The next thing I knew, I was on my back with something warm pressed up against my side. His lips touched my temple as I blinked to find Tony’s arm lying across my front, angled up with his hand on the other side of my face. Without thinking, I turned my head to the side to look into his sleepy eyes.

He took my breath away when he kissed my forehead. “Experiment was a success, gem. Have a good day. And you’ll be seeing me tonight.”

But as he got up to leave me, I realized he was right. I didn’t dream. I slept through the night, escaped the noise and the pain that always took over when I slept.

That’s how it’s been for the last three weeks ever since Thanksgiving. Tony comes to me every night and I take it all knowing I shouldn’t but wanting it badly because I’ve only dreamt twice with Tony in my bed. He never wants anything more. He pulls me into his arms where I go willingly, he kisses me on the head, and tells me to go to sleep.

I’m more rested and less stressed, even though my divorce still isn’t final. Preston is claiming he was high the night be beat me, causing me to lose our baby. He’s checked himself into a thirty-day treatment program and another court date has been set for the middle of January when he’s supposed to be finished with his pretend treatment. Preston could drink heavily and was a mean drunk, but he never did drugs. I would recognize the signs. Tony was none too happy when he had to deliver this news, promising me it should be over in January.

My second patient is due for his meds in ten minutes so I head that way to chat with him until it’s time. He’s elderly and doesn’t seem to have a lot of visitors. Since I’ve been here for almost ten hours, we’ve gotten to know each other well. I’m almost to his room when my phone vibrates again. It has been going crazy for the past hour-and-a-half and I haven’t had a chance to check it. I’m able to spare a couple minutes so I turn back to the nurses’ station as I pull out my phone. I have five voice mails and eleven texts, all from Gabby, Paige, and Jude.

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