Page 111 of A Study of Blood and Ichor

Then a velvety smooth voice sung through the silence, a whisper inside my head.

I am yours.

THIRTY-THREE

Rory

In death, there was nothing but darkness—nothing but the familiar endless void.

And yet I was…breathing? The scent of smoke filled my lungs, and there was a split second where I decided I must be back in the confines of my subconscious mind again with Vain in the driver’s seat. Only I couldn’t feel him there. That space where I could normally sense his presence, that constant, swirling essence was…empty. And that realization only forced my heart to skitter to a halt. Because if Vain was gone, then I really must be dead. There was no way that I could have reasonably survived without him.

But I couldn’t remember dying.

A heavy blanket of fog shrouded the corners of my mind, making it difficult to wade through my memories. The last thing I remembered was the sound of Ava’s voice breaking as she screamed my name over and over. And that memory came with the most horrific pain I had ever experienced, like my body was being split in two.

“Rory?”

Her voice cut through the dark, and my heart beat against my ribcage so hard I thought it might burst.

“Is he breathing?” Ava sounded closer that time. A low, muffled voice responded from farther away, one I could almost place but didn’t have enough of my senses to identify it.

My fingers twitched against something soft underneath me. My eyelids fluttered open apprehensively, half expecting that this was all just my mind playing tricks on me—like how when people died the synapses in their brains would still fire, causing them to experience what some thought was an afterlife.

That had to be it.

“Rory!”

Ava threw her body on top of mine, hugging us close together as she wrapped her arms around me. The scent of her was overwhelming…but it was her. I could feel her.

My limbs felt too heavy to move. The way that she clung to me, the way her hands traced every line and curve of my body as if I were some precious, fragile thing. It was almost as if she were trying to convince herself that this was real just as much as I was.

I pulled all my strength into my arms and tugged her down by the waist so that her body was fully flush with mine. I felt the smooth, warmth of her skin beneath my fingers and realized that she wasn’t wearing a single shred of clothing. And neither was I.

I froze, knowing immediately what she had done and what it had cost her. What it must have cost Vain.

I knew Vain had prepared for the possibility of my death. But I had never expected Ava to pay that price for me. And that realization sat like a heavy weight on my chest.

Ava shook over me with gentle sobs.

“I’m here,” was all I could manage to say as I tucked my face into the crook of her neck and the fall of her hair. I held her tighter than I ever had before.

From across the room, there was a whisper-like hiss along the floor, slowly edging further away. When I peered into the darkness, I could only make out the shadow of a tall dark figure, standing perfectly still as he watched us from the doorframe.

Vain slowly turned away and left the room. My eyes did not leave the empty space he’d left even long after he had gone.

It was bizarre to no longer have a demon pestering me in the back of my mind when I went to do just about everything. That space where Vain had once occupied was nothing more than a nagging phantom limb.

Soft morning light streamed through the windows of the empty kitchen. I was content in the silence. I hadn’t realized how much I had missed it. My thoughts were my own. My body was my own. It felt alien and a little terrifying, but also a relief at the same time.

The sound of bare footsteps barreled down the hallway, and Ava flew around the corner, short of breath, eyes wide, and cheeks flushed. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

Golden rays of morning light haloed her disheveled hair like she were a radiant sun. The faint smattering of freckles across her nose appeared brighter, her amber eyes clearer as they sparked at me. It felt like I was seeing her for the first time. And she took my fucking breath away.

I had to fight the urge to laugh as I tipped the end of the spatula down. “Uh… making pancakes?”

Ava glanced at the griddle on the stovetop and then back to me as she heaved a relieved sigh. “You’re supposed to be resting.”

“Can’t I make you breakfast?” I said through a warm smile. It faded quickly though when I took in her pained expression and I realized that I’d left her to wake up alone. She hadn’t left my side once since last night. “Oh shit, did I scare you?”

---