Page 39 of Here With Me

“How…” Her question hung in the air.

“The rafting instructor in the second raft saw what happened. He jumped in and freed my foot. But I’d been under for a while. I’m told I responded well to CPR and was talking before they took me to a local hospital. Although I don’t remember that part.”

Sadie sucked in a breath as she rested her soft hand gently on his arm. He hadn’t dated much since Sadie. Hadn’t met anyone that made him long for the closeness of physical touch. He’d remained so distant from everyone that he’d forgotten the power of a simple touch. He settled his own hand on top of hers, relishing the feel of her soft skin against his palm. “And Remy?”

David pulled his hand back and gripped the steering wheel. “They airlifted him to the nearest hospital. His head injury caused severe spinal damage. They are hoping he’ll be able to walk again.” The truth of it threatened to pull him right back under. “I let him down.”

Sadie shook her head. “Bad things happen, David. We don’t always know why. But it’s not your fault. You saved him from drowning.”

No. David shouldn’t have allowed Remy to go rafting. And because he hadn’t stepped up and protected Remy when he needed it, it was possible David had single-handedly derailed God’s plan, because he hadn’t heard God since. God seemed to still be punishing him by keeping him in Heritage.

Sadie’s hand squeezed his arm again, the weight a gentle pressure.

A longing curled into David’s system—where the feel of Sadie’s comforting hand wasn’t so foreign or fleeting, where it was a constant lifeline. Where he had someone who could go through life with him every day. Someone to be there for the highs, the lows, and everything in between.

“David, you know that God moves in ways we can’t understand. You know His ways will always be better than what we can imagine.”

Her words settled over him. Oh, how he wanted that to be true. But maybe he’d messed everything up. David tightened his grip on the steering wheel. Maybe it was in his blood to mess things up.

He glanced over at her. He wanted to believe her. But how could she offer up these words of kindness, of forgiveness? He’d left her. Shattered both their hearts and walked away from her. But the way she settled her hand on his arm, he wanted her to hang on. But if she did, he might hurt her all over again.

Sadie pulled her hand back and tucked her foot under herself in the seat. “I never thought my life would be what it is today. But I wouldn’t change any of it, because I have Lottie. Sometimes life takes many turns to bring us to where we’re supposed to be.”

“What kind of turns?”

Sadie let out a deep breath and sank back against her seat. David couldn’t make out her expression in the shadow of the car.

“I was pretty aimless after we broke up. When Bonnie died, Jeremy asked me to become Lottie’s nanny. I never imagined that one day it would lead to marriage.”

David’s palms stung as he gripped the steering wheel tightly. His breath caught in his throat, and for a brief second, he remembered that feeling of terror as he’d realized he couldn’t hold his breath any longer, and he sucked in a lungful of water.My marriage.

His lungs squeezed out the air, painfully. He’d known about her wedding for a while, but the pain gripping his insides,that was new. It shouldn’t matter though.

But it did.

Because even after ten years, Sadie still had the power to steal his breath away, calm him with a mere touch, and encourage him with her uplifting words.

“When Jeremy found out about his diagnosis, we talked and agreed marriage might be the best thing for Lottie. You know Machado-Joseph disease doesn’t have a long survival rate. We started the adoption process right away. Unfortunately, Jeremy passed away before the paperwork could be finalized. Because of his death, and the continued aftermath of Covid, the adoption process slowed way down. Jeremy left custody of Lottie to me, but now Doris, Jeremy’s older sister, is threatening to contest it.”

“You’re great with Lottie.” David turned off the highway and onto Heritage Street to drive into the center of town. A bolt of lightning flashed across the sky, illuminating the road in front of him.

“I try. Lottie has lost a lot. Her mom, her dad, and she never knew her biological grandparents. But at least here, she has my family.”

“Your family is pretty amazing. Lottie is lucky. Your parents love big. Even me.” David cleared his throat. “Jeremy’s parents had passed before I met him.”

“His mom passed when he was in high school. His dad while he was a freshman in college. Part of the tension with Doris is because she tried to mother Jeremy. Doris and Patrick were already married with a son when their mom passed away.”

David could imagine that hadn’t gone over well between the siblings. Sadie loved Lottie though. Jeremy couldn’t have picked a better person to leave her with. Sadie worked hard, she loved without reservation, and she cared. It’s what made falling in love with her the first time so easy.

And what made getting over her so hard.

“Why didn’t you change your last name to Linden? You still go by Hoover.” David moved his right hand up and down the steering wheel.

“Honestly? There wasn’t time. I had intended to, but between Jeremy’s doctors’ visits, caring for Lottie, life—it didn’t get done.” Sadie looked out the window. Her shoulders rounded slightly, visible in the streetlight they passed under. “I did love Jeremy.”

His heart stilled. Of course she had. She’d married him. And he’d been a jerk to ask. “He was your husband.”

“Yes. But more than that, he’d become my best friend. Jeremy was a good man, a good husband, and an incredible father.” Sadie looked down, and her voice dropped. “I didn’t love him the way I loved you.”