Page 7 of Sticky for You

I knocked at the door.

Nothing.

Although I could hear them whispering furiously inside. I poked at our mental link.

One big empty void.

I furrowed my brow. What in Great Rhu had I done to upset him?

It wasn’t like I’d acted any differently from normal. I mean, I know I’m Twirlie fabulous. How could I be in monster heaven one minute, and ready to ride him into the next fertile rhubarb patch… then booted out the door like a limp stalk the next?

When was a young stalk gonna catch a break?

“Hey, Twirlie, you forgot your pants when you went to visit the new neighbors, son.”

I looked over my shoulder to see Bart chortling at me. He was the eldest stalk in town. Kinda stringy, in my opinion, but he had a good heart. I plastered on a smile and waved at him. “You know me, Bart. Always eager to say hello.”

His snort-laugh turned into a hacking cough. I let him laugh his way down the street, then turned back to the door. I tapped at it again, but my mate didn’t open it and the whispering had died away.

Forlornly, I got dressed, promising my sad dick it would get its mate soon. I didn’t know what I’d done wrong. Maximus had sounded so happy when he announced we were mated. He’d said it was cool.

Then… he rejected me.

I sighed, giving it one more minute as I finished getting dressed before giving up. Leaving the bag of rhubarb by the door, I jogged down the stoop. I needed my alpha’s advice. I had to talk to Crimson. If anyone knew what I’d done wrong, it would be her.

Crimson smiled at me as I walked into the store. Thankfully, it was empty. I didn’t fancy trying to have this conversation in front of Glass and Red. I’d never live it down. Me, rejected by a monster. They’d laugh until their stalks split.

“Tim, I didn’t expect to see you back here.” Then she furrowed her brow. “What’s the matter, young stalk? What’s happened?”

I heaved myself up onto the counter. It’s where we always sat when we wanted to talk to Crimson. I drew my knees up to my chest and wrapped my arms around them.

She patted my back. “Talk to me.”

“It’s the monster.”

“What’s he done? If he’s hurt you, we’ll run him out of town with the pitchforks.”

I stared at her wide-eyed, taken aback by her fierce tone. “Holy Rhubarb, Crimson! I want to have sex with him, not poke him full of holes.”

If anyone was doing the poking, it would be him doing that to me and he could poke away at any hole he liked. The problem was how to get that to happen.

She rolled her eyes. “That’s the trouble with you young stalks. You’re always thinking with your dick.”

And this was why I talked to Crimson and not my mom. We could have these conversations and she wouldn’t judge me… much.

“Yeah, well, my cock likes him a lot.”

“Your dick is super friendly,” she agreed. Nothing phased her. “And if he doesn’t like you, then you’ll find someone else. You always do. These things happen, sweetheart. One day you’ll find the right stalk for you, and bam, your stalking days are over.”

“You don’t understand. He does like me. I know he does. His dick is all ‘come to me, little stalk, and show me your custard’. It’s so happy to see me. I mean, you can’t miss it, Crimson. It’s huge.”

I held out my hands in the universal sign for ‘It’s this big’. I didn’t exaggerate that much.

“I get the idea,” she said hastily, blushing. I didn’t know she knew how to blush. “Then what’s the problem? I don’t understand.”

“We were doing the… uh… foreplay on his doorstep. I’m naked and wiggling in his hands. It was all going so well, Crimson. Then I called him a monster and, bam! I’m out of the soil! He shuts the door in my face and refuses to talk to me.” I buried my face in my knees, not wanting her to see how upset I was, but I guess I failed miserably because she rubbed my back in soothing circles.

“Monsters are strange creatures, sweetheart. You can’t expect them to think like rhubarb. Their bodies are so big, it wears out their brains. Are you sure you want to get stalky with a monster?”

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