Page 46 of False Idols

“Ohhh, so there’s a lucky lady for you then? Nice to see you didn’t waste any time from being locked up.” Jordan is a loud fuck and as much as he swears that he’s my friend, he sure does bring up me being in prison an awful fucking lot. I’ll have to watch his ass for more than the jealous boyfriend and insecure athlete bullshit.

I nod and brush past his mention of my time behind bars. “There is. Four years was a long time to go without a good woman. Don’t plan on wasting time now that I’m free.”

Billy grins and raises his soda can to me. “That’s fucking beautiful, man. Good luck with her.” The rest of the idiots raise their cups to me and give me their blessing like it means anything to me.

I lift my cup and take a quick sip. “Appreciate it. I’ll need all the luck to make a woman like her mine.”

I did four years for her, after all. She’s mine and they’re all going to know it. But there is the problem with tonight that I now suddenly have. How do I get Nevaeh to come to the party? There’s no way she’ll put herself in the line of fire if she doesn’t have to. The dorm party was easy enough because there was no getting away from it when it was happening right outside her door. Tonight is going to take some planning.

I pull out my phone and think as I scroll. I pull up Nevaeh’s profile and stare at the light. It’s green. When I lean back to look out the windows where I saw her earlier, I see she’s on her phone while her friend chatters away. She looks so carefree and happy. I type out a message and hit send and just like magic, I watch her change. Her shoulder tense and she drops her phone on the table while her friend looks at her in surprise. God, seeing her panic goes straight to my dick and I can’t look away from her. There’s no one else but Nevaeh. Just my beautiful fucking liar panicking while the world falls away. I can’t read her friend’s lips, but I know she’s asking Nevaeh what’s wrong.

Nevaeh looks around the quad. She’s trying to find me. When she doesn’t see me, she stands quickly and starts to gather her books while she gestures for her friend to follow her. The girls leave a minute later with Nevaeh looking over her shoulder the entire time. I love seeing her panic, her fear is like an aphrodisiac to me and I want more.

I’ll always fucking want more.

My phone buzzes with a message and I smile when I see Nevaeh’s name. I knew she was going to respond. Just like the good girl she is, she tells me exactly what I want to hear.

“Okay, I’ll be there. I promise.”

18

NEVAEH

Come to the party after the game tonight. 1570 Mathias Ave. Promise me you will, or else, Angel. I’ll come find you and we both know you don’t want that.

I don’t know what to do. It’s from Beau. I freeze and drop my phone on the table with a gasp though and look like an idiot.

“You okay?” Sunny asks. She’s concerned and I have to give her my fakest, brightest smile for her to let it go.

“Yeah, I’m fine. I just remembered I have a report due that I forgot about tomorrow. I have to go work on it now if I’m going to go, ah, to that party later.”

Sunny perks up. “Party? What party? I thought I just talked you into going to the football game. There’s a party we're going to now?”

I nod quickly and stand fast as I grab my books and start shoving them into my bag. I have to get out of here. Beau’s close, I can feel it. I don’t know how or why, but I can. I look around the quad and don’t see him anywhere. I can still feel eyes on me though. I need to get out of the open.

“Um, yeah, it’s like, an after party or whatever, I guess? I forgot about it.”

“Since when do you go to parties?” Sunny asks as she skips ahead of me. “I’m not mad about it but like, I had to talk you into the game so….” She twirls and gives me a raised eyebrow. She’s curious. That’s what I love about her, but I have to throw her off the scent of why I want to go to the party, because I didn’t think The guy I’m in love with who definitely took my virginity and threatened to slit my throat, also threatened to come find me if I didn’t wasn’t going to go over well with Sunny.

“Maybe the ghosts told me to do it,” I tell her, opting for a light approach. “All that time in the graveyards really has them concerned about me lately, you know?”

Sunny laughs and I know it worked. “Yeah, I bet they’re a real scream.”

“You don’t even know the half of it,” I joke and then shrug as I offer her a more genuine smile. “I just, well, maybe you’re right that I’m missing out on the college experience because of what’s happening. I heard about the party in a class and decided what the hell?”

“You promise not to ditch to sleep at this party?” she asks with a wag of her finger.

Sleep. That’s what she thinks I was doing. I think about Beau and what it felt like to have his body on mine. His hard dick inside of me while he whispered my name. There was no denying the orgasm that he forced out of me. I’ve never felt anything like it before. He forced bliss and ecstasy on me, all the messy and beautiful parts of my body that the church made me think were dirty. Beau took those parts and turned them into something new and overwhelming, he made it feel like my life was ending and beginning in those seconds and minutes that he touched me the way I was never brave enough to explore fully.

Guilt and shame always stopped me from reaching orgasm, but when I did touch myself it was to him. It was always to Beau. I wasn’t dumb enough to think that there would ever be anyone else for me but Beau. There couldn’t be. As fucked up and twisted as it was, there was no one else for me. It makes sense that it was him that woke that part of me up and forced it into being.

The sad truth of it is that Beau didn’t have to threaten me to get me to go to the party. He didn’t have to tell me he would come find me. The Or Else wasn’t needed, because I would go anywhere and do anything he asked me, even if I put up a fight at first.

“This is going to be even better than the dorm party!” Sunny whoops and runs up the steps to our dorm. There’s people outside but they ignore me. I’m glad for it. I don’t know how long it’s going to last. This fragile peace that’s marked the past two weeks of my life on campus can’t go on forever, and with Beau contacting me, I feel like it’s over and something big is on the way. I felt this way before the trial and after for weeks on end. My therapist said it was anxiety and Survivor’s Guilt, this feels the same now. I rub my palms on my thighs as I follow Sunny up the stairs and into the dorm. There’s only a few hours before the game tonight. It’s an evening game with a late afternoon kickoff, so I don’t have much time left before I see Beau. Because against my better judgment, I’m going to do something stupid and reckless. Almost as stupid as agreeing to see Beau tonight, but stupid and reckless is all I’ve ever been when it comes to him.

Tonight, I’m not waiting for the party to see Beau. I’m going to take it straight to him at the game and force him to tell me what he wants from me. Let’s see how much he likes getting surprised on his home turf this time.

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